Why I Wish I Didn't Love You
by DemonSaya
Summary: Ch 7 up! Kagome is a writer by day, waitress by night. Inuyasha was born into money. All she wants is to forget about her life prior to leaving home. He just wants to spend time with her. RomanceAngst IYKag MirSan KouAya Maybe some SessKagura
1. Chapter 1

Why I Wish I Didn't Love You...

By: DemonSaya

Chapter 1: Beer and Whiskey

"When I was a child, I used to read fairy tales. You know the ones. Sleeping Beauty, Cinderella, Snow White." She closed her gray eyes and smiled faintly. Her face was tilted towards the ceiling just a bit, the camera trained on her face showing all that natural beauty. "Stories that spoke of Prince Charming showing up and rescuing the princess; them living happily ever after." She looked back at the camera. "I used to dream and wish that I was one of those princesses and that my Prince Charming would come and take me away."

The host laughed. "Most women had those dreams. Since we're on the subject and I'm sure the male viewers are wondering, did you ever find your prince?"

Her laughter was warm, rich. However, it was just slightly tainted with bitterness. "No, Tetsu, I didn't. You see, like most little girls, I grew up. Growing up I learned that there really is no happily ever after. Those princesses ran off to the first member of the opposite sex that was attractive and attracted to them. I'm sure ten or fifteen years down the road, Cinderella was looking at an overweight prince who had grown accustomed to her kindness and had begun to take advantage of it. He was probably having an affair with her ugly stepsister, had his lawyer digging dirt on her so that when he divorced her, she was left penniless, heartbroken and alone. Not so Charming anymore, is he?"

"That's a rather cynical view on love, Miss Higurashi." He tugged at his collar, his smile becoming awkward.

Those gray eyes shone. "I didn't say that was my view on love. Just on the 'happily ever after' in a story book." She lowered her eyes, looking at her hands. "Those are not the same things, Tetsu. Storybooks have 'love at first sight', which gives people the impression that the exterior of a person shows their true value. If a woman has a beautiful face, tiny waist, big breasts, she is more capable of being loved than someone who looks more average."

She shook her head. "No, that's not love. Love would have to be when two people have such a deep emotional attachment that their outsides have little effect on it. When he's forty, going gray prematurely, and she has stretch marks from being pregnant and her breasts aren't as perky as when she was twenty, but they still kiss like when they were teenagers or take afternoons to make love by a lake...That's love."

"A lovely sentiment. Unfortunately, that's all we have time for today. Thank you for coming Miss Higurashi."

Kagome saw the artifice in the mans smile as she shook his hand. Yes, in this day and age where people believed the outsides were more important than nurturing the insides, her words would be hard to swallow. She left the stage and pulled the microphone off her shirt, dropping it into a tray and adjusting her collar. It didn't matter. Six years ago, when she'd first went to college, she'd been one of them.

She smiled sadly as she left the studio. She'd been on the fast track to becoming a lawyer. She'd been a year away from graduation, working as an intern in a law office when she came to realize that everyone she knew was about making a bigger buck. That she too was falling into that trap. So she packed her things and left school, never looking back. She used what was left of her money and bought a small apartment in Kobe, transferred to Konan Private University, studying something she hadn't done in years.

Writing.

Now, she made a meager living on her stories, selling them to the resident dime-store romance publisher. She lived alone, with a cat and wrote ROMANCE. The irony made her chuckle a bit. She was neighbor to the rather eccentric, old woman named Kaede, and a lecherous monk named Miroku. The small one bedroom had a small bathroom, a decent kitchenette, and a small living room. It was a comfortable space, not so large that she felt uncomfortable.

As she stood, waiting for the bus, she unpinned her uncomfortably tight, sensible hair and sighed in relief as it fell down her back, and pulled her tennis shoes out of her back pack which doubled as a purse. She slipped her aching feet out of the uncomfortable, ill-fitting Payless heals, and into the comfortable sneakers.

She could feel the eyes of several people on her and ignored them. The Japanese had a saying, 'the nail which sticks out is hammered down hardest'. Her grandfather had quoted that saying to her when she went home and told her family what she'd done before moving to Kobe. Her grandfather had tried to convince her to move back in with her family, that a woman on her own would be taken advantage of with no men to take care of her.

She snorted softly, climbing onto the bus as it arrived, slipping her hand through one of the straps that hung from the ceiling. Her unfashionable suit itched uncomfortably against her skin, and she frowned faintly. She made a mental note to spend a little on a decent one after she got paid for this quack interview.

The trip took longer than normal, due to several accidents, but within an hour, she was standing in front of her apartment building, a sigh escaping her. She glanced down at her watch. She had twenty seven minutes to get ready for work. She used her card key to open the door and slipped in, walking to the stairs and jogging up them two at a time. She slipped into her apartment just seconds before one of her neighbors peeked out into the hallway.

She practically tore the suit off, dropping it onto the pile of clothing that needed dry cleaned and found a crisp white shirt hanging in the closet. The pants that went with it were still laying on the ironing board. She snatched those as well and ran into the bathroom, showering in the small stall. If there was anything she missed about her old home, her old way of life was a bathtub. She was just hopping out when the phone rang. She answered it, as she found her most comfortable bra and slipped into it. "City Morgue, you stab 'em; we slab 'em." She answered evenly.

"Kagome Higurashi!"

She sighed. Her mother. Someone else she'd disappointed by leaving school. To her mother it should have been school as a lawyer, or a husband. She'd even attempted to arrange a marriage. "Hi mama." She said, pulling on some lace underwear. She didn't often wear things that were more expensive than sensible, but lace underwear made her feel pretty. "I don't have a lot of time, I'm getting ready for work."

"I saw your interview today." The older woman's voice was a bit tight, sounding angry. "You could at least not embarrass us when you're talking to eight million people."

Kagome scoffed. "Trust me, mom, I'm less worried about embarrassing you than I am about being able to live with myself and the things I say." She began to apply her make up, using a chocolate brown to accent her eyes, applying black mascara and a hint of peach blush. She topped off with a nice sheer peach lipstick. Then she grabbed the curling iron.

The phone was silent for a long time. "Kagome, Hojo called today. He'd like to speak to you."

"No." Fury was beginning to fill her. "No, mom. I don't think so." She took a steadying breath and began styling her hair. "I've gotta go. Bye." She hung up before her mother had a chance to object. She closed her eyes, and tied the messy mass of curls into a banana clip. She rested her hands on the sink and took an unsteady breath.

Hojo. Her 'Prince Charming'. To avoid that subject, she glanced at her watch and quickly dressed. Her twenty minutes had dwindled down to eight. She found her favorite black sneakers and pulled them on, snatching up her purse and ran to the door. She took the stairs down to t he lobby and broke into a jog. She reached the restaurant and punched her card, just as the clock hit five o'clock. She skidded to a halt with the rest of the waiters and waitresses.

"Glad you could join us, Higurashi." The sound of her boss caused her to cringe. "You'll be working the VIP room today. We're expecting some important guests for a business meeting. Be on your best behavior. Go now, they should be here in about ten minutes."

Kagome took a steadying breath and walked out to the main part of the restaurant. Her best friend, Ayumi was already there. Ayumi was the one friend from high school she'd kept in touch with. All the others had stopped talking to her when she and Hojo broke up. She gave the girl a weak smile and stretched. "So, any big tippers tonight?"

"Hm? Oh...no..." Ayumi sighed, looking at her. "I'm thinking of quitting, Kagome. I can't take this anymore." She said softly. "Mom and dad say they've found a nice boy from a good family. They say he makes enough to support a wife and children." She sighed, looking towards Kagome, wringing her hands. "I just don't know if I can take this forever..."

Kagome rested a comforting hand on her friends shoulder. "Do what you have to, Ayumi. You deserve to be happy." She said, ruffling her friends hair. "Marc wont like it, you're one of his best waitresses." A sly grin formed on her lips when she saw the blush on Ayumi's face. "You wouldn't have feelings for Marc would you?" She whispered.

"Yeah, but he's also my boss." She sighed. "I don't want an arranged marriage. But...I'm so tired of being alone."

That thought returned Kagome's thoughts to the one's she'd been fighting all evening. "Remember the motto." Kagome said, raising her hand. When Ayumi mimicked her, she continued. "I will not stay with anyone who doesn't truly love me, and I will not marry anyone I don't love."

A small smile formed on Ayumi's lips. "Thanks, Kagome, I needed that." She saw Kikyou, the hostess seating someone in her section and smiled at her. "That's my cue. Looks like your group's here too. Good luck."

Kagome slipped unnoticed into the VIP dinning room and glanced over the nights menu. Two new items. She'd practice when she was getting the beverages. She straightened just as they began filtering into the small space. The tall one was Sesshoumaru Kurokawa, white hair gold eyes, dressed in a no nonsense charcoal grey suit and a cream shirt. Martini or wine drinker. The next one was Naraku Ishihara, Black hair, black eyes. Dressed in a black suit and purple and black striped tie. Water. No tip.

After that was a short, pinch faced man, she didn't recognize him, but he was following very closely to Mr. Kurokawa. He was dressed in a plain cheap suit. Probably would order soda. Following him was a medium height young woman dressed in a chocolate colored pantsuit and rose colored shirt. Her clothing screamed wine, while her eyes begged for a beer.

A few others came after, the woman with the elegant dress was probably a exotic mixed drinker, the short, fat, bald man in the khaki's bottled water or perrier.

Just as everyone was seated, one last person came in. Kagome was presenting the wine list to Sesshoumaru and glanced up to get an estimate on this one. Her breath caught in her throat. He was dressed like a bad influence, from the exquisitely tailored suit pants to the dark red shirt and black tie. Over his shoulder he had a black leather jacket and under his other arm was a motorcycle helmet. His hair was long and silver, his eyes golden, and above that delicious silver hair were two triangles of fur that she had to fist her hands to keep from reaching for. His appearance was such a contradiction, she couldn't guess how he would order.

Quickly she tore her eyes away. A table full of demons, two of which were known for their gift of scent. She turned her attention to the man at the head of the table and found him staring at her in curiosity.

The bad influence sat down at the opposite end, but she put her attention on the order of this person. "Merlot." He said calmly, as though he hadn't noticed the subtle shift in scents as she noticed his brother walking in late. "You're late, Inuyasha."

"I'm always late, why should I make tonight a special occasion?" The younger demon asked, smirking.

Kagome tuned out their chatter, taking everyone's drink order. The woman in the suit stared longingly at the beer list then ordered a glass of merlot as well. Each ordered as she'd predicted, until she reached the one at the end of the table. When she reached him, he grinned. "Whiskey sour." He said evenly, and she noticed that the man at the head of the table cringed. Kagome smiled politely and headed towards the kitchen and bar to place their drink orders. Leaning over the bar, she slipped the tender a ten, and asked him to slip in a long neck stout as well, and to hold one of the glasses of merlot for a minute.

When she returned, they had settled into their business discussion, and she listened with half of her attention while serving the beverages with the other. She intentionally held off serving the woman until the end. She set down the beer next to the woman and saw her startled expression. Kagome folded her tray under her arm and stepped back into the corner when the woman didn't object.

Unfortunately, the kinda slimy Mr. Ishihara noticed. "Didn't you order a merlot, Sango-san?"

Kagome tensed and stepped forward. "I'm so sorry-"

Sango grinned at her. "No, don't worry about it."

Kagome bowed. "I'll see that the cost of the beer is not on the bill." She promised. When she straightened she noticed two pair of golden eyes on her, wearing appraising expressions. She had been waitressing for the past two years and had learned she had an innate talent for reading people. It had served her well during that time, making her one of Chez Marc's best waitresses.

A few minutes passed and they put in their dinner order. She logged them away in her long term memory not surprised when Mr. Ishihara ordered the cheapest thing on the menu. She delivered the order to the kitchen, then took a five minute break before returning to check and see if they needed anything else. She found Kikyou standing at the door to the VIP room, about to enter. "Kikyou, that's my table." She said evenly, seeing the woman's face darken.

"Like you deserve to serve the wealthy. You don't have any aspirations. If I can get in good with them, I'll be set for life. They come in every couple of days and leave huge tips for their waitress!" She sighed. "Oh, to be rich..."

"Did you ever think..." Kagome began coldly. "That the reason I'm serving them tonight is because Marc knows you think like that and because I 'have no aspirations'?" She slipped through the door, putting on her polite face. After taking a moment to calm down, she addressed the table. "Would anyone like some more to drink?" She asked calmly.

Everyone placed their drink orders once again and she went to fill them. When she returned with the beverages, Kikyou was back at the hostess station. She handed out the drinks, then went back to stand in the corner.

"Naraku, you're such an idiot."

The conversation opener caused her to start, and she glanced towards the end of the table where the bad influence sat.

"Excuse me?"

Sesshoumaru put his hands to his face, sighing heavily. He pointed at his brother. "Inuyasha, you're the idiot. Mr. Ishihara makes an excellent point. The merger of these two companies would be beneficial. By merging, we would be able to keep the competition from growing, and we would be still following the monopoly laws."

Inuyasha scoffed. "Yeah, right. EVERYONE who would be affected would benefit, right. You're an idiot, too, Fluffy." He snapped. "And if you think I'm signing a third of MY stock over to this daffy bastard, you're nuts."

Kagome fought the urge to smile. His language was crude, but he enunciated every syllable, still making him sound like a gentleman. She felt her beeper vibrate, the signal that the food was done, and she quietly and quickly ducked out of the room. She picked up the two heavily laden trays and flagged Ayumi down. "Hey, girl, any big tippers?" She asked, grinning.

She grinned. "One or two. How's the VIP room?"

She paused, considering how to answer that question. Kagome had been around business men before, yet this group was unlike anything she'd ever seen. "Well, it's the most interesting group I've served in about two weeks." She swept out of the room, and then into the VIP room, setting the trays down on a small side bar, then began scooping up the plates, setting them on her arm. She passed them out quietly, and when she was done, she bowed formally. "Enjoy your meal." She said, then left the room once again. With a sigh, she walked to the bar and rested against it, taking another break. The tender had changed shifts, and now Kouga was on duty.

"Hey, beautiful!" He said, leaning over and kissing her cheek lightly. Kouga was a decent friend, dating a lovely young wolf demon named Ayame. They'd been together for roughly three years and he had told her recently that he was going to marry her. "How's your night been?

She smiled back and stretched. "Murder. I've got a business dinner in the VIP room, featuring Naraku Ishihara, Sesshoumaru Kurokawa, and a few other's that I can't name-"

"Is that bad influence one of them?" Kouga gestured towards the door.

"Go Fuck yourselves!" The man called Inuyasha shouted back into the room.

Kagome snorted faintly. She expected him to head for the door, but instead, he walked right up to the bar and slammed down both hands. "Jack on the rocks." He snarled. "Put it on Fluffy's tab."

Kagome pretended to be interested in the magazine that someone had left sitting there. It was an issue of Lifestyle magazine. She rolled her eyes, until she skimmed past a picture of the bad influence who sat three seats away from her at the bar. Inuyasha Kurokawa. She blinked, startled, just noticing the family resemblance.

"Um, who's fluffy?" Kouga asked evenly, frowning faintly.

"He's referring to Sesshoumaru Kurokawa." She said evenly, flipping the magazine closed. She stood and pushed a stubborn strand of hair behind her ear. "Talk to you later, Kouga. I'll be back in fifteen to get refills." She calmly walked back to the VIP room, ducking in to ask if she could do anything for them.

Inuyasha blinked, watching the girl go. He glanced at the blue-eyed bartender. He picked up his drink and sipped it. "What's her story?" He grumbled. The girl never looked ruffled. She took orders without using a paper to jot notes down on and with the exception of Sango's merlot, hadn't made a single error.

Kouga glanced towards the dog demon and snorted. "Ask her yourself." He grumbled. Kagome was his co-worker and a good friend. He wasn't going to be the one who told this rich bastard a thing about someone as kind and good as Kagome.

"Does she ever get ruffled? She didn't even flinch when she screwed up one of the drinks." The hanyou watched the girl disappear into the kitchen and return two minutes later with the drink tray.

"Two coffees, a dirty martini, lady godiva stranded on an island, Vitamin C,D,E and F in a blender." She said evenly, then paused, slipping Kouga a five. "And another long neck." She said grinned. Then she was gone.

Inuyasha blinked. "Sango had asked for a Merlot, and got a Stout. Wasn't that a mistake?"

Kouga snorted. "That girl doesn't make mistakes. She reads people. She's never gotten penalized for her assumptions because usually people are more pleased with her decision than their initial choice. She's our best damn waitress."

Kagome returned moments later, and sat down for a moment, looking rather frustrated. "They had me pull out that damn desert tray for nothing. Long neck wanted a slice of the chocolate delight, but that slime ball disguised as a businessman opened his mouth before she got a chance." She rested the tray down as Kouga began loading up the drinks. She felt eyes on her and saw Inuyasha looking at her with distinct interest. "What?"

"How did you know Sango wanted a beer?"

Kagome blushed, standing and taking her tray, now laden with drinks. "She dresses like a wine and martini girl, but she's got the eyes of a beer drinker." She looked back at Kouga. "Thanks, Kouga. I'm off when this the table clears out. Give Ayame my love." She turned and headed back towards the room.

Inuyasha huffed, almost grinning. "Does she work here every night?"

"Most weeks. Unless she's behind on a story." The bartender arched an eyebrow. "Why, you interested?"

He scoffed. "What's it matter to you? You her boyfriend or something?" The bartender's expression darkened. He finished his drink and stood, pulling on his jacket. "In my line of work, people like her are non-existent. I'm curious. That's all." He said simply, straightening his collar.

Kouga frowned. He reached across the counter and caught Inuyasha's arm. "Look, that girl has a purity that is untainted. If you damage her in anyway, I know at least half a dozen people who'd be more than willing to kill you." He looked at him dead in the face. "Get it?"

Inuyasha rolled his eyes. "I just want to talk to her." He said calmly. "So get out of my face." He shrugged of the bartender's grip and headed towards the door.

o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o

Kagome sighed softly, gently patting her purse, feeling the comforting weight of her 9mm semi automatic pistol. It had been a bitch of a day all around. 4 am till 10 pm was not her idea of a good time. That coupled with her mother's mention of Hojo...

She bit her lip viciously hard, the pain dulling the memory and the hurt that accompanied it. She couldn't afford to be distracted. The walk from the restaurant was well lit, and not particularly crime filled, but a girl could never be too safe.

She rubbed her neck with one hand, her feet aching, and a splitting headache developing behind her eyes. She sighed softly when she reached the entrance to the apartment building in which she lived. Miroku was standing at the mail boxes, waiting up on her. She gave him a weak smile. "Hey Miroku. How you doing?"

"Better than you, obviously." He sighed, shaking his head. "Come on, darling, let's get you upstairs and some food in your stomach."

She let her best male friend lead her upstairs and smelled the scent of Kaede's cooking permeating the hallway. "Kaede made soup for the floor again didn't she." She said, smiling slightly. Kaede was eccentric, but she took care of all of her floor like they were her kids. Sometimes she felt that Kaede treated her better than her own family.

Except her brother. Her brother was a gem.

She was led into the common area, where Kaede was already spooning up a dish of food. "You're an angel." She said, taking the bowl and sitting down with a ceramic spoon.

"How was work, Kagome?" The old woman asked, a small smile widening her thin lips.

"Busy. They put me in the VIP room for a business dinner. Bunch of bureaucrats. Kurokawa family." She sighed, shaking her head. "Naraku Ishihara was there too. Drank water, ate chicken, and didn't leave a tip."

"That stiff..." Miroku complained.

Kagome shrugged. "I only work that job to cover rent, so it's not like it matters. My writing handles the other bills, and I'm left with sufficient spending money for things I want." She shrugged. Besides, I got about $100 dollars in tips from the others. Especially Ms. Long Neck."

"Long Neck?" Kaede arched an eyebrow.

"She asked for a merlot, but wanted a beer. I brought her a Long Neck Stout. Don't know her name so, I call her by the drink." She chuckled, then sobered as her mind began to wander. Two hands began gently working the stiffness out of her shoulders and she glanced back, seeing Miroku wearing a concerned expression on his face. "Sorry, did you say something?"

"Your mother called."

Kagome's breath left her in a rush. Yes, that would concern them. "Hojo wants to get back together I guess." She said calmly, ignoring the pain pricking in her chest. It was an old wound but it still hurt. "More of the usual. Don't worry about it, I can handle my mother."

"Next time she calls, come get me. I'll tell her I'm your boyfriend." Miroku joked.

Kagome chuckled. "She'd have a coronary. Starving author and starving musician. Yeah, that'll stop her." She patted her friends hands. "Don't worry so much. It Hojo is just a little whiny brat."

"So, you still game for tomorrow night?"

"You've bought every last one of my cheesy little dime-store romances. I think it's the least I could do to come to your show." She grinned at him. "Just remember, though, when you make it big, new apartments for everybody!"

Everyone in the room laughed at their own private joke. Kagome stood, lifting her water glass and held it high. "To the Building of the Starving Artists and all those starving inside it! May Ramen and Easy Mac forever be in our cabinets and may our hearts be light with the pleasure from doing what we truly love!"

"And to jobs that pay the bills!" Miroku added, grinning as the rooms occupants toasted their glasses.

o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o

_AN: Yeah, so I'm back for a little while. Dunno for how long. My darling daughter decided to give me a day of rest by sleeping between feedings, so I've managed to get a whole chapter done. Oooooo. Anyways, love it hate it, tell me what you think. This started as a free writing exercise, that just reflected my past feelings a little too well. So that's all from me. Review if you made it this far through my ramblings. Critique is welcome. Flames are not. TTFN. DS_


	2. Chapter 2

Why I Wish I Didn't Love You

By: DemonSaya

Chapter 2: Walking and Talking

The club was crowded, dark, and filled with murmuring people. The band was setting up, led by a man with black hair pulled back into a ponytail and mischievous violet eyes. The hanyou sighed, preparing himself for another night of painful music. Unfortunately, this was the only bar in town where he could hide from his brother.

He watched the band setting up and saw a girl talking to the band leader, wearing a bright smile. Idly he wondered if it was the boy's girlfriend. Till he got a good look at the girls face. He could scarcely recognize her in the casual setting, her hair down around her shoulders, gray eyes lit with laughter. But it was her, the waitress from the restaurant.

She was dressed in a faded t-shirt and jeans that had several holes in them. On her feet were a pair of five dollar keds tennis shoes. Her face was free of makeup, her cheeks slightly flushed from happiness. When the band started playing, she clapped the loudest of the group in the front row.

He couldn't explain his mixed feelings about her. He didn't know her at all, yet at the same time, he could have sworn he knew her all his life.

As he watched, a flamboyantly dressed male came towards Kagome and bowed just as flamboyantly, and the woman laughed. She put on a semi-serious face and nodded, allowing him to assist her in standing, and they made their way to the dance floor. A strange twinge of jealousy nagged at him. After a few moments of watching them dance, he headed towards them. He tapped the man on the shoulder. "My turn with her." He said evenly.

The man glanced curiously towards Kagome, who was wearing that neutral mask she had worn while working. "It's okay, Jakotsu, I'm a big girl, I can take care of myself." She turned towards him and waited until Jakotsu had returned to the group. "Fancy meeting you here." She said evenly. "Didn't think people with money hung out here."

"That's exactly why I'm here. It's the last place my brother will look." He admitted, grinning. "Besides they make a damn good whiskey sour."

They had just begun dancing when her beloved friend Miroku, may worms dessicate his corpse when she's done with him, started up on one of their ballades. She glared at him, he winked at her.

Inuyasha wasn't blind. When he saw an opportunity, he took it. Easily, he took her hands and rested them against his shoulders and rested his own on her hips. They swayed in silence for a few moments before he spoke. "I'm Inuyasha." He offered, knowing that he'd never properly introduced himself.

"I know who you are, Mr. Kurokawa." She said mildly. She glanced away. He was trying to be courteous, and she was being rude. "I'm Kagome." She finally said, still not looking at him. It was difficult. He was devastatingly handsome, and she'd been hurt by someone who was attractive before.

"Kagome..." He tasted her name in his mouth and found he liked it. "So we established why I'm here. Why are you?"

She glanced towards the stage and found her friend grinning at her from ear to ear as he sang, his voice mellow. "Supporting a backstabbing friend."

"Sounds like a wonderful relationship." He said, slightly sarcastically. "What did he do?"

"He's the idiot up on stage." She said evenly. "He's been trying to hook me up for the better part of two years, since I transferred into his school."

"You're in school?" He felt shock course through him. He'd pegged her as young, but he'd figured she was in her mid to late twenties at least. "How old are you?"

"I'll be twenty four in about a month." She said evenly, glancing up at him. He relaxed a bit. She rolled her eyes.

He grinned at her. "So what kind of degree took six years to get?"

"I don't have a degree. I dropped out of my last school." She felt her voice getting that pinched, strained feel. The song ended, and she pulled away from the boy, clapping her hands, cheering for her friend, while silently wishing him dead. She was about to head back to her friends when his hand caught her arm.

"Let me buy you a drink?"

She turned towards him, glaring at him. "Why would I want to owe you the money it costs for a drink?"

"Consider it me paying you back for you having to endure me as a dancing partner." He had hoped the light joke would cause her to relax, or even smile a little, but there was nothing. "Look, I just want to talk. Promise." He gave her a slight grin. "You're a better conversationalist than I'm used to running into around here."

She allowed him to lead her to the bar, not trusting him for a minute. "Probably because they're all stone drunk." She said evenly, sitting down at the bar. "Hey, Takashi, the usual." She said, her face calm.

"The usual for you as well, Inuyasha?"

The hanyou grinned, nodding. Moments later, his whiskey sour was set before him, and he glanced to see what she had. He was startled to see a bottle of water. He sipped his drink, and arched an eyebrow. "You don't drink?"

"I don't drink with men." She corrected. "I am known to have a shot of whatever suits my fancy on nights when I've had a rough day or when I'm working on a story."

He sipped his drink and examined her face. There was an old hurt there, a wound to the soul that he could almost place a finger on. "If you write, why do you work as a waitress, too?"

She turned to face him fully, mild irritation showing on her face. "My my. Aren't you just full of questions." She took a long swig from her water and swallowed, trying to hold her temper. "Did you ever consider I might enjoy being a waitress?" She brushed a strand of hair behind her ear and snorted. "God forbid people do a job because it's what they want rather than because it makes them lots of money."

He'd touched on a sore point. He could have been blind and still realized that. He shook his head. "I don't get you." He said calmly.

"The feeling's mutual." She replied, toasting his drink with hers. "It's better that way." She turned her back to the bar and watched her friend perform. "Jakotsu is about as close as I want to come to understanding any man."

"That guy you were dancing with?" Inuyasha asked. "I don't follow."

"Jakotsu doesn't swing my way." She said pointedly. "He's a gifted dancer, and great fun to go shopping with. On those rare occasions when we have enough money to go shopping." She smiled ruefully.

He looked at her startled. "What do you mean?"

She gestured with her hands. "Look at where you're sitting, rich boy. In the poor district of town in a somewhat seedy bar, with a waitressing author. Did you think I was from the same caste in society as you? I live in the Building of the Starving Artists, and you know what, Mr. Kurokawa?" She crossed her legs and looked at him pointedly. "I'm happy. I practically live on easy mac and ramen and off brand cereals. Now and then, when I'm lucky, my neighbor, Kaede makes me dinner."

He looked at her, stunned. Her speech was impeccable. She truly was gifted with words. Yet, what she was suggesting sounded ridiculous. Foreign. And strangely excitingly forbidden. What would it be like to live a life like that? It sounded so free, so wonderfully exhilarating. "You should be careful with ideas like those. You could sell rags to Sesshoumaru with speaking skills like that. Wish I could employ you."

A reluctant smile turned up the corners of her lips. "I don't sell my skills to business men, Mr. Kurokawa."

He saw the slight smile and grinned back. "My name's Inuyasha." He leaned back against the bar and glanced towards the door. "Mr. Kurokawa is my brother." And he was coming through the door now, which caused everything to come screeching to a halt, even the band. "Speaking of the devil..." He grumbled under his breath.

"Inuyasha, what in the name of hell are you doing here?!" The demon thundered. "We had a meeting with Ishihara tonight and after your stunt last night, you're lucky I don't sack you!"

Kagome glanced between the brothers and arched an eyebrow. She was surprised that her companion didn't even flinch. "Looks like you need to find a different bar to visit." She said to him, sliding off the bar stool. She turned towards Sesshoumaru and straightened, putting on her calmest expression. "I can appreciate that you're pissed off. But do the band a favor. Go yell somewhere else. Some of us were enjoying the music." With that, she headed back towards the group of her neighbor's who were standing by the stage.

Both brother's were stunned with the calm, cool, collected way she gutted the older demon. Inuyasha was still watching her with something resembling admiration when his brother pinched one of his ears and drug him forcefully out of the bar. He was hurled into the back of a limo and his brother climbed in behind him.

"What the hell are you doing here? With a waitress no less?!"

Inuyasha snorted, and looked away. "Hiding from you." He said honestly. "I didn't even know she was going to be in there. I just wanted to see what made her tick."

"It's unhealthy for the rich to surround themselves with people like that!"

The hanyou snarled. "What bothers you more, _brother_? That she's waitress or that she's a waitress that I'm intrested in.

The hand came out of nowhere, effectively silencing the hanyou. Sesshoumaru tightened his grip around his brother's neck. "Maybe I should sack you."

"Maybe I want you too..." Inuyasha wheezed, knowing his brother wouldn't. Life like Kagome lived was looking better and better. Calm, peaceful life. Life without having to worry about Naraku's systematic take-over of the company. Life where he could do what he enjoyed rather than just doing something that had been handed to him by his parents. He was sick of living the restricted life his brother did. Unfortunately it was all he'd ever known, and he didn't know what else he might want from life.

It didn't seem fair.

When Sesshoumaru realized that his brother had turned inward, wrapped in his own thoughts, he released him and tapped on the window, indicating that they should leave. "What the hell is so interesting about a waitress, anyways?"

Inuyasha stared out the window, resting his chin on his fist. "Would you consider yourself happy, Sesshoumaru?" He asked, watching the neon lights flashing by. "Can you honestly say that you've ever seen anyone in our family really happy?"

"I have never felt any discontent with my life. Father was always quite happy with your mother as well." The demon pulled out his blackberry and began doing something with his calendar.

"Would you be shocked if I told you I wasn't happy?"

The demon looked at his younger brother, startled. He'd known for years life as a businessman was not something Inuyasha was suited for, but his father's trust demanded that Inuyasha be given some responsibility. "What makes you unhappy? You have everything you could possibly want, and monetary means to acquire anything you don't have."

Inuyasha sighed, looking at his brother. As usual, the emotionless expression was plastered to the great demon's face. Great. Right. Great and blind. He knew Sesshoumaru had never been happy, neither had he. His mother had been happy with their father, and vice versa, but only when they were together did he ever see them truly happy. And when his father died, his mother all but fell apart. In this land of wealth and beautiful people, she became horribly depressed, and for the last eight years of her life, she went from one anti-depressant to another. Finally, she wound up taking a bottle of Valium and drinking a bottle of booze to kill herself. In fact, until he saw those friends-god had he even ever had any real friends?-clowning around at the bar, he'd never seen people who were happy.

Those shining gray eyes popped back into his head and he sighed. He pushed them away and went back to looking out the window. "What was shit head suggesting now?"

"He suggested that I sack you for insubordination." Sesshoumaru snapped. "For God's sake, why the hell do you hate him so much?!"

Inuyasha took a steadying breath. "Because he's an ass, and if we give him the chance, he'll hang us to dry by our heals. Something ain't right with him. Sango and Kagura see it too. Hell, I bet Kagome saw it." He said the last part under his breath.

"Who's Kagome?" Sesshoumaru glared at him.

Inuyasha rolled his eyes. "The waitress."

"What makes you think an uneducated waitress would be able to tell whether or not Ishihara is planning to hang us out to dry, as you put it?" The demon looked at his well manicured nails, noting a slight tear on one. He'd have Jaken schedule an appointment in the morning.

The hanyou scowled. "What makes you think that just because she's a waitress that she's uneducated?"

"If she had an education, she wouldn't be working a lousy job. She'd be making a name for herself in the world."

"You're such an ass." Inuyasha grumbled. He was tired. He hadn't realized how tired he was. It was like all the life had been sucked out of him. The car slowed to a stop in front of his families large estate and he opened the door, climbing out and looking up at it. If he could trade the cold, sterile, formal environment to have what those people at the bar had, he would.

The brother's didn't speak until they reached the door. Then, Sesshoumaru stopped the younger demon. "Inuyasha, don't forget, meeting at eight am sharp."

Inuyasha grunted in response, mounting the stairs that led to his wing of he house.

"And Inuyasha..." Sesshoumaru paused, a tight expression on his face. "When you decide what it is you want, tell me. I'll make sure you get it."

The hanyou turned towards the demon, his face a cool mask. "You don't get it, do you?" Inuyasha said quietly. "What good is it if I don't get it for myself?" With that, Inuyasha disappeared to his rooms, leaving Sesshoumaru standing in the foyer, wondering the same thing.

o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o

Kagome sighed heavily. It was an evening when she wished she wasn't a waitress. She was once again reminded that the rich stayed rich by being cheap. With a sigh, she ruffled her small handful of bills and then clocked out. She gave Ayumi and Kouga a fake, cheerful look as she left the restaurant. A sigh escaped her as she closed the door behind her and was sucked right back into her chest when she turned and found Inuyasha Kurokawa standing there, staring up the street. "You'd better hurry. They stop serving in about eighteen minutes." She said, turning to head home.

Instead of heading inside, he addressed her. "Can we talk?" He asked evenly.

She hesitated. Why was this guy so interested in her? "Maybe some other time-"

He caught up with her. "Kagome-"

She turned towards him, wearing a cool expression. He was wearing a rather antsy expression. He didn't look well. His face was pale and drawn. Kagome may dislike wealth and as a result, the attitudes of those who had it, but she was still a compassionate person. "Miroku gets antsy when I don't show up on time. If you want to talk, do it while we walk." She continued walking, surprised when he actually fell into step beside her. "So what did you want to talk about?"

He snorted. "I don't know. Unlike you, I'm not good with words." He heard her snort, and glanced towards her face. There was a touch of amusement in her almond shaped gray eyes. "That guy, Miroku. He wait up for you every night?" He saw her nod, a slight smile playing across her lips. "What is he, your boyfriend or something?"

"More like an older brother. We're not blood related, but when I...left my old life behind, he helped me a lot. Got me into an apartment, helped me get this job, helped me study for class on days where I was so frustrated I couldn't concentrate." She felt her warmth towards the older boy spread outward. "He's one of my dearest friends." She paused, glancing towards him. "My turn. Why are you so interested in my life?"

He faltered, then looked at the sidewalk as they moved along. "I don't know." He admitted. "I suppose I'm curious what it must be like." He stuffed his hands into his pockets. "I was born into wealth. My dad gave me half of his business in his trust. I've never known anything else. I don't know the kind of freedom you have. I probably never will."

She laughed softly. "Oh, to have the resources you have." She lifted her eyes to the sky. "I could finally settle down and work on my novel. I've been churning out crappy dime-store romances that ooze so much cheese it's disgusting. I have to because it's what the readers want. They want to believe that everyone will get that happily ever after ending."

He blinked, looking at her. "You sound rather bitter about that..." He commented calmly.

"I'm happy with the life I chose." She said smiling. "Even if I can't stand the literature. I enjoy earning what I receive. It keeps me moving towards my goals. Most of my family wont speak to me, and most of my friends think I went insane. But I'm doing what I love and even if I can't stand most of what I do, I can still think of that novel, strive towards it, and someday..." She lifted her face towards the sky.

"Someday?" He prompted after they'd lapsed into silence for several moments.

"Someday I'll get there." She grinned towards him. "My turn again." She looked him full in the face. "What exactly do you do? I get that you inherited part of your father's company, but what work do you do there?"

He snorted. "I'm a paper pusher. I make sure the decisions that my brother makes are legal, and I show up at meetings when I'm told." He paused, remembering last Friday's business meeting. "Most of the time." He smirked a bit. He looked at her again. "What's your favorite color?"

She laughed.

Tilted her head back and laughed.

He was stunned at the light that shone from her face when she did. That face was the one he'd wanted to see again. The one that shone with laughter. Unguarded, joyful, bright. Her laughter was a pleasing sound and it sent chills up her spine. "What? It's an honest question!"

"Yellow..." She finally answered when she caught her breath. "That was the least personal question I think you've asked since we met."

He shrugged. "Aren't you going to ask mine?" He arched an eyebrow.

"Don't need to." She said, grinning. "Red." She said evenly.

"Mind reader..." He grumbled, but it was just for show. "Out of curiosity, how did you know?"

"Because in the three time's I've seen you you've always been wearing red. Your motorcycle is also garnet mica metallic. You also wear a garnet class ring on your ring finger of your right hand." She looked towards him and grinned. "January birthday?"

He chuckled. "Guilty as charged." Their laughter died slowly and they fell into a companionable silence. She turned towards him and gestured towards a rather run down looking apartment building.

"This is me." She said, stopping and staring up at the apartments, waiting for the ridicule that she'd heard from her mother.

"One more question, then." He walked around so they were looking each other in the face. "Can I walk you home again tomorrow?"

She blinked in surprise, then smiled. "I'd like that." She headed towards the door, then paused, hearing him head back up the street. "And Inuyasha..." She tasted his name for the first time and was surprised to find she liked the way it felt.

His heart froze in his chest. Slowly, he turned back to find her smiling at him. It was a smile he would never forget. Shy, almost girlish. Innocent. "Y-yeah?" He wanted to curse when he stuttered.

"Thanks for walking me home. I never thought I'd say this to someone in your caste, but..." She lowered her eyes. "I had a nice time." With that, she stepped through the door and disappeared into the building. She moved up the stairs to her room and glanced down at the sidewalk from her window. She could still just make out the silver of his hair. A small smile curled up her lips and she shook her head.

Later, she realized that he had filled what had been a bad evening with laughter, turning it into a pleasant night. No, she wouldn't mind spending more time with him at all.


	3. Chapter 3

Why I Wish I Didn't Love You

By: DemonSaya

Chapter 3:

Inuyasha sat in his office, bouncing a rubber ball at the wall that separated his office from his brothers. It hit with a dull thud each time, and he could practically hear his brother's concentration break each time.

It had been a week since he'd started walking Kagome home from work, and he found it was his favorite time of day. She had an amazing knack for making what would have been a terrible day into something that was full of laughter and light. Neither of them were being dishonest about their reasons for walking together. Inuyasha wanted to know her. She appreciated the security his company provided.

He was pleased, however, to notice that she had grown more comfortable in his presence. She would smile and greet him when he arrived. He allowed himself to pretend that she looked forward to that time of day as much as he did. He didn't ask her about her family, she didn't ask him if his brother knew about their nightly walks. Both questions would open doors that needed to stay closed. It kept a polite distance between them. Friendly towards each other, but not friends.

Inuyasha threw the ball, catching it as it flew back towards him, then glanced out the window. It was getting dark. Soon, he'd run downstairs, hop onto his motorcycle and head towards the part of the evening he enjoyed the most. The clock was only a minute and a half away.

He was reaching for his jacket when Sesshoumaru breezed into his office, wearing a calm expression. "We have to work late." Sesshoumaru said calmly. "We've got paperwork to go through."

"It can wait till tomorrow, right?" Inuyasha asked, glancing towards his brother, keeping his carefully schooled nonchalant expression on his face. "I'm beat."

"They're needed for tomorrow's meeting." Sesshoumaru sat down in one of the arm chairs and tossed the rather hefty stack of papers onto Inuyasha's desk.

The hanyou fisted his hands tightly. "Fine. I'll be back in five."

"We should start now-"

"They'll still be here in five minutes, right?!" Inuyasha snapped at his brother. Just because Sesshoumaru didn't have anything better to do was paperwork didn't mean Inuyasha didn't have other plans. "And the tabloids wonder why I don't have a fucking social life." He snarled, stepping onto the balcony with his cell phone. He speed dialed the number for Chez Marc's and sighed as the phone began to ring.

"Chez Marc's, how may I help you?" The voice on the other end was a womans. From the sound of things, it was the hostesses. Kikyou something or other.

"Is Kagome available, I have a message for her from a friend." He said evenly. He learned three nights ago that introducing himself wasn't the best idea. The hostess was unnecessarily talkative, and didn't deliver his message.

"She's busy. May I take the message?"

"Is Kouga busy?" He could hear the voice on the other end become cold.

"Yes."

The hanyou took a calming breath. As he calmed himself, he grinned. "Then let me talk to the manager."

A breathless squeak. Moments later, Kagome was on the phone. "Hello?"

"Kagome? It's me." He sighed, relieved. At least he'd get to hear her voice.

"What's up?" Evidentially, she knew better than to announce who she was talking to. That made him grateful.

"I'm not going to be able to pick you up from work tonight." He said quietly. "Somethings come up at work and my brother's being a dick about it." He glanced towards the door and saw his brother hanging around on the other side of the curtain, listening in. The jerk-off.

"It's alright. Stuff happens and all that, right?" He could have been hearing things, but she sounded slightly disappointed.

"Pick you up tomorrow?" He asked, leaning against the steal railing and lowering his voice a bit.

There was a sigh. "Tomorrow's my day off. My friends and I were planning on going dancing at a karaoke bar." A pause, then she began again, a touch of hesitance in her voice. "You could join us if you'd like."

He grinned. "I'd like to." He confirmed. "Tell me where." He pulled out a pen and jotted the name of the bar and Kagome's cell number down on his palm. "Awesome. I'll see you there." He hung up his phone and slipped it into his pocket, reluctantly going back into his office. His brother was once again sitting in the arm chair.

"Who was that?" Sesshoumaru asked evenly. The demon's eyes said he knew exactly who Inuyasha had been talking to was. He didn't understand why his brother was so interested in this waitress.

Inuyasha sat down and looked up at his brother, his face calm. "A friend." He said evenly. "Let's get this shit over with."

To Sesshoumaru's credit, he didn't question his brother further.

o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o

Kagome lay back in her bed, staring up at her ceiling. She didn't know why she had invited him to go with her friends to their favorite little karaoke bar on this side of town. Maybe it was his disappointed tone as he told her that he wouldn't be able to pick her up tonight. Perhaps it was the soft sigh when she mentioned she wasn't going to be able to walk home with him the next evening.

In reality, it was because she enjoyed his company. As much as Miroku's, as much as Ayumi and Kouga's. She never would have imagined that she could enjoy the company of a wealthy bureaucrat. He was intelligent, kind in a gruff sort of way. He was one of the beautiful people. He was interested in her, and he didn't seem to be losing interest.

That amazed her, worried her, frightened her.

She hadn't been friends with anyone outside her caste in years. It was safer. More comfortable. And until Inuyasha, more enjoyable.

She sighed, hugging her pillow. "What the hell am I doing?" She knew better than this. As soon as Inuyasha tired of her, he'd do exactly what Hojo had done. What Eri and Yuki had done. What her mother and grandfather had done.

And she'd be alone again with nothing but her cat and kooky neighbors.

Not that she didn't adore her neighbors, but it was different with Inuyasha. She groaned, rolling onto her belly. How long had it been since she lost sleep over a male?

Never.

That thought caused her to freeze. "Oh, crap..."

Before she could explore those thoughts further, her phone rang. "Joe's pool hall, 8-ball speaking." She answered, hearing her mother's irritation before the older woman ever spoke. Lovely. Nothing like a nice chat with mumsy to put someone in a good mood.

"Kagome, it's lovely to speak with you-" Her mother's voice oozed with fake cheerfulness. "I've been trying to get a hold of you for a few days but you haven't been answering your phone, I've been worried."

Right. My ass. Kagome closed her eyes and took soothing breaths. "What is it, mom?"

"We were wondering if you were coming home for your grandfather's birthday." She could tell her mother was clenching her teeth. It was a thorn in her side to even suggest it. "Hojo will be there..."

"Next Tuesday, right?" At the affirmative sound, Kagome rolled her eyes. "I've got work. I'll try to come by that weekend."

"It's his eightieth birthday!"

Kagome took a soothing breath. "Does it have to do with his birthday, or you pushing me to get back together with that scumbag Hojo?!" She couldn't keep her voice down. "You know what, don't bother. I can't put my life on hold. I've got rent to pay."

"You could always move back in with us!"

"NOT ON YOUR LIFE!" Kagome hung up the phone with all her strength, wincing as she caught her finger between the rest and the receiver. "GOD DAMN SUNUVA WHORE!" She shouted, shaking her finger.

Not two minutes later, there was a knock at her door. She sighed softly. She woke up her neighbors. Either Miroku or Kaede would be outside, ready and willing to calm her down. With a groan, she rolled off her futon, grabbed her robe off it's hanger and wrapped it around herself. She walked to the door and opened it, a weary expression on her face, tears already dancing in her eyes. Dark eyes stared back at her under black bangs. "Hi." She said weakly.

Miroku immediately wrapped an arm around her and guided her back into the apartment. The door was left open. "Kaede'll be here in two shakes of Buyo's tail. She's making tea."

Kagome laughed weakly. "Sorry I woke you guys."

"Kaede was up working on some more of your ammo, I was practicing without the amp. Jakotsu was practicing his steps, and Ayumi was reading one of your books." He grinned at her. "Besides, if we're not here for each other doing hard times, what's the good with being neighbors?"

Her friends good mood rubbed off on her and she smiled at him. "Thanks, Miroku. You're a great friend." She let him lead her to the couch and smiled as he rubbed her back lightly. Miroku liked to tell her that she was the only girl he never groped, which was probably true. He'd always kept a brotherly attitude with her, especially since when they met, she didn't trust men all that well. "Mom called." She said softly, putting her face in her hands.

"I suspected."

"They want me to get back together with Hojo and go back to the shrine. She called under the guise of inviting me to my grandfather's birthday party." She felt the sob rising in her chest and tears filled her eyes. "Why do they want me to go back to that life?! Why can't they be happy with the life I'm leading now?!"

Miroku didn't say anything. He simply sat there, rubbing her back gently. "It's alright, Kagome. Don't worry about a thing." Angrily, he bit his lip, drawing a drop of blood. Damn them. Damn her 'family' always putting tears in eyes that should always shine with happiness. "We're gonna take care of you." He promised. "Don't worry..."

o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o

Inuyasha adjusted his tie, thanking god for casual Fridays. He was wearing his favorite sneakers, well fitted black jeans and a red shirt. No tie. No damn tie. He grinned, noting that several women were checking out his assets as he walked into the office where the end of week meeting would be held. His long hair was tied back into a low ponytail, and shockingly, brushed till it was shining.

"Well, look what the cat dragged in..." Sango said, grinning. "Who are you seeing after work that you got all gussied up for?"

"Keh." He collapsed into one of the leather chairs and grinned at her. "A friend."

"Friend?" She gave him a look that said 'yeah, right, and I'm Donald Duck'. "Who might this friend be?"

Inuyasha scooted towards her and dropped his voice. "Remember the business dinner at Chez Marc?" He asked softly.

Her eyes flew wide. "Not that slutty hostess that keeps showing up here claiming to be your girlfriend!" (AN: Cough, I don't have to be nice to Kikyou all the time...) She exclaimed in dismay. "Inuyasha, you could do so much better!"

"Not her, the waitress." He mumbled, waiting for his friend to laugh at him. To his surprise, she nodded in approval.

"She's not so bad. A little mellow for you, though." She paused. "So where are you two going? Dinner?"

He shook his head. "Karaoke bar." That she did laugh at. "What?!"

"I know you, man. The bucket you carry your tunes in leaks like a sieve." She laughed harder. "I might have to come along to see this!" She paused, seeing him blushing furiously. "So what about this waitress, she your friend or a girlfriend?"

The idea of Kagome being his girlfriend was oddly pleasing. "I walk her home from work. We talk. I enjoy her company. Nothing touchy feely. Just conversation."

"What do you two talk about?"

"Lots of different things." He grinned, then scowled when his brother walked into the room. "See, I'm on time, so do me a favor and let us go home on time."

"Why, you going on a date?"

Inuyasha wanted to slap his brother's emotionless face. However, just then, Naraku, Kagura and a few other's from the Ishihara company walked in. He noticed a flicker in his brother's eyes when Kagura walked in and sat down next to her boss. Interesting. He'd have to give his brother a hard time about it later.

The meeting droned on, Naraku continuing to spout about how it would be mutually beneficial for the companies to merge, and Inuyasha could see it was wearing on everyone's patience. "If that's all there is to talk about, I'm outta here." He said, beginning to stand.

Sesshoumaru looked at him with disapproval.

Naraku glared at him with an icy expression. "You don't deserve the position you have, you worthless child-"

"That is my brother you're talking about, and I'm afraid he's right. We've heard this same song and dance about how it would be beneficial." Sesshoumaru straightened the papers sitting in front of him. "Rude though he is, he is also still correct. We're all getting rather sick of it. Sango, tell me the figures."

She cleared her throat, disguising a laugh. "Yes, sir..."

o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o

Kagome sat at the bar, turning her shot glass around and around. She was already rather thoroughly sloshed, and as she stared at the dark liquid in her glass, she wished that she could drown all her worries until she couldn't remember which way was up anymore.

She had consented to go out tonight despite her mood. She had hoped the happiness of her friends and their excitement would help her get out of the ditch her mother had thrown her into last night, but it wasn't working. The crap Hojo had put her through wouldn't leave her mind, and her mother's sharp words about not laying down and letting the little bastard walk on her was still an open wound, an infected open wound that put a dark stain on her life.

She was supposed to be happy.

"Hey, Kagome!"

The voice caused her to turn towards the door and she saw Inuyasha standing there, looking like a bad influence, with his beautiful silver hair and bewitching golden eyes and she smiled weakly. She lifted her hand and waved. The girl beside him was 'Long Neck'. Idly, she wondered what their relationship was.

Inuyasha came towards her and noticed she had a glass in her hand filled with what smelled like Kahlua. He disguised a frown with a grin and pushed Sango in front of him. "This is Sango." He said. "She made me drag her along." He hopped up onto the barstool next to her and gestured. "Now, go dance, and embarrass yourself, the lady and I want to talk."

Kagome smiled politely. "Nice to meet you. I'd make introductions, but I'm a tad indisposed." She said, gesturing towards her glass. "MIROKU!" She shouted, seeing that she got her friends attention.

He walked up and glanced from Kagome to Inuyasha to Sango, who he proceeded to undress with his eyes. "What's going on?"

Sango gave him a dangerous glare.

"Miroku, this is Sango and this is Inuyasha. Play nice. No groping the new girl." She gave him a firm look, then glanced at Sango. "Go on. He's harmless."

Sango hesitantly let Miroku lead her onto the floor, where he proceeded to introduce her to everyone else.

Inuyasha ordered a glass of water and glanced at her worriedly. She wasn't smiling. Not really smiling. These were her polite, distant smiles. "You alright?" He asked, watching her drain the glass and watched in dismay as the bartender filled it back up. "How many of those have you had?"

"Enough that I know I'm going to be hung over in the morning." She said lightly. "I'm fine, Inuyasha, really."

He frowned deeply. She was lying. "Don't lie to me, Kagome. I know better." He gently touched her shoulder, surprised when she slapped his hand away. "Kagome..."

"You don't know me!" She hissed angrily. Her mind barely registered the expression that rested between confusion, anger, and sadness. "You only met me a few days ago. That hardly counts as knowing someone!" Why wasn't he yelling back? Why wasn't he fighting back?

"You're right." He said quietly. He looked down into the water that had been set before him and silently wished it was something else. "But I'm still your friend." He climbed off the barstool. "Sorry, when you invited me to come, I thought for two seconds you wanted my company. Must have been having delusions or something. I'll go."

Guilt racked Kagome and she grabbed the sleeve of his shirt and stopped him. "I'm sorry." She said. "I tend to take out my anger on people who don't deserve it. I..." She lowered her head. "I just had a bad night last night and..."

He slowly took her hand in his and pulled her off the seat. "Come on, Kagome. Let's dance." He pulled her onto the floor and just as they were getting ready to dance, the music changed, and a ballade came on. He paused, looking at her and grinning. "I guess we're destined to only dance to slow music. Probably better that way. My brother is fond of saying I dance like a chicken whose been ritualistically disemboweled."

The statement caused a reluctant smile to turn up her lips and she rested her hands on his shoulders, swaying with him to the music. "I'd like to see that."

"Keh..." He glanced away. Gentlly he brushed a strand of hair behind her ear. "Do you mind if I ask what's got you so upset?"

She hesitated. "Someday I'll tell you the whole story. Suffice to say that my mother called last night and the phone call didn't end amicably." She expected him to push for more, and was mildly surprised when that didn't happen.

"I'll hold you to that." He hugged her a bit closer. For the first time in two days, he felt content. Here, with his arms around this girl, he felt strangely comfortable. He gently rubbed her back, hoping to make her sadness ease a little.

Kagome, meanwhile was really beginning to wish the room would stop spinning. She fisted her hands in the crisp red cotton and whimpered. "I'm gonna puke." She broke away from him and made her way towards the door. Once outside, she fell to her knees and proceeded to throw up the contents of her stomach.

Inuyasha followed her out and knelt beside her on the pavement, gently easing her hair from her face. A few moments later, several other people from inside the club joined them. The one called Miroku knelt on the ground and sighed.

"Darling, you know you can't hold your liquor."

"Shut up, ya lech..." She slurred before falling forward to throw up some more. God she was pathetic. Throwing up outside a bar, with Inuyasha Kurokawa holding her hair back. The ridiculousness of the situation made her laugh, which she instantly regretted.

Inuyasha sighed. So much for spending an enjoyable evening together.

"I should take you home, Kagome..." Miroku moved towards her, and Inuyasha waved him off.

"I'll do it." He volunteered. He helped Kagome stand and pulled her arm around his shoulders. "Just tell me which apartment number is hers."

Miroku blinked. "3H." He replied automatically. "You know how to get there?"

The hanyou nodded. "Don't worry about it."

"I dun wanna go home..." She whined. "If I'm at home, I have no excuse to ignore my phone and I dun wanna talk to mama..." She looked up at Inuyasha in desperation. "Please don't make me talk to my mama..." She promptly passed out following that.

"Sango, give him my cell. I'll call you when I get her home. I'm going to disconnect her phone." He scooped her up onto his back and began walking towards her home. He sighed heavily, fishing out his cell phone, dialing his brother's number. "Heya, Fluffy. I'm gonna be later than usual."

"What happened?"

Inuyasha sighed. He might as well tell him. "Kagome's drunk. Sick drunk. I'm going to take her home and keep an eye on her."

There was a long pause. "The waitress?"

"Yeah."

"You two are on a first name basis now?"

"Yeah."

A sigh. "Very well. I can see well enough when my caution will go unheeded." Sesshoumaru sounded calm. "Don't do anything stupid."

"Hey, you know me."

"That's what I'm worried about."

o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o

_AN: Thanks to everyone who reviewed the last chapter. Thankies millions!_


	4. Chapter 4

Why I Wish I Didn't Love You

By: DemonSaya

Chapter 4:

Kagome hadn't been this drunk in years. Not since she'd been together with Hojo. Or had it been longer than that? Her body remembered this feeling, even if her mind forgot. THIS was why she didn't drink in public anymore. She knelt on the bathroom floor, resting her forehead against the cold porcelain of the toilet. "Ugh..."

A hand was gently stroking her back, keeping her hair out of the way. She didn't even know who it was, she was that far gone. Yet, she knew it had to be Miroku. He was one of the only guys she knew who wouldn't take advantage of her when drunk.

Hojo had sure never had that problem.

Another wave of nausea struck her and she heaved into the toilet again. There was no longer anything in her stomach, and the taste of stomach acid made her heave harder. Tears filled her eyes and she began to cry. "It's not fair..." She whispered. "Why can't anyone accept me for who I am?"

Inuyasha didn't answer her question. Instead, he put his arm around her shoulders and gave her a light hug. What was he supposed to say? The truth of the matter was he'd never been very good at the whole comforting thing.

Kagome turned into his neck and buried her face into it, wrapping her arms around his chest, crying as though her heart were broken. Slowly, she began to return to herself. The hand on her back patted her awkwardly and she blinked. Miroku was always quite good at this. Whoever held her right then wasn't nearly as used to it. Sniffling, she pulled back and found herself looking into concerned golden eyes. "Inuyasha?" She asked, wiping her nose on her sleeve.

He gave her a weak excuse for a smirk and lifted his hand to wipe the tears off her cheeks. "Feeling better?" He asked softly.

She felt the strange urge to laugh insanely. "No one's called?"

"I took your phone off the hook and turned off your cell." He said evenly. "Miroku called to find out if you were okay about an hour ago, they're on their way back." He took her hands and gently helped her stand.

"Thanks." She said softly, looking at the ground, feeling like garbage that had been rotting in a trash bag for a few years. She let him lead her to her couch and sat down on it while he disappeared into her kitchen, returning with a bag of ice wrapped in a towel. She let him help her into a laying position and sighed in relief when the bag lightly touched her skin.

He sat down on the ottoman, watching her silently. "Why were you drinking, Kagome?" He asked after several moments. He kept his voice as calm as possible, not wanting her to know just how worried he'd been when he'd first seen how drunk she'd been.

She smiled bitterly. "My mother called last night." She said evenly. She toyed with the hem of her shirt, sighing. "Mom and I used to get along. We used to laugh and have fun. When I dropped out of Tokyo International, she was furious." She laughed. It wasn't a happy sound. "Now it seems all we do is argue."

He looked at his claws, not sure what to say. "I always thought you were happy." He said evenly, his elbows on his knees, his silver hair falling in a curtain around his face. He had caught glimpses of her pain behind her eyes, but only brief ones. Usually, she looked much happier than anyone else he'd seen before. "That night at the bar you looked so happy, and you smile and laugh so easily...I..."

She gave him a small smile. "I'm happier where I am than where I was going. I have friends, real friends, not those creeps who smile at your face then stab you in the back. And I'm doing what I love." She glanced fondly towards her computer desk.

He looked at her face, liking this Kagome much more than the one he'd found at the bar. "That's a far cry better than I'm doing." He admitted. He laced his fingers together, studying the carpenter's beige colored carpet. It was synthetic and itchy on his feet. "I live in the same house as my brother, my only friend is Sango, and I'm her boss. I hate my job, and I'd quit, but I don't know what else I'd do. All I've ever known has been this business, this life." He felt his frustration rising and he slid a hand through his hair. "I wish I could throw it all away, but if I did..."

Kagome watched him, sympathetic. She gently reached out and took his hand. "You have another friend you forgot to mention." She said softly, giving him a warm smile.

His head snapped up and his vision was filled with her smiling at him. She was flushed and pale at the same time, and there were large bags under her eyes, but to him she was the most beautiful sight on the planet. A slow, small smirk turned up the corners of his lips. He brushed a strand of hair from her eyes. "Thanks." He said softly.

His cell phone rang and he pulled it out of his pocket, reading the name on it. With a groan he answered, seeing the curiosity on her face. He pointed towards the phone and mimed hanging himself, earning a giggle from her. "Yeah, Sesshoumaru, what do you want?"

"Dinner is in ten minutes. Should I hold it?"

"In other words am I on the way home yet?" Inuyasha asked, a slight growl in his voice. "Loosen the leash, Fluffy."

"So I shouldn't hold it."

"Exactly." Inuyasha waited for his brother to start complaining. There was a bloated pause before Sesshoumaru spoke again.

"Is the girl alright?"

He blinked, startled. After a moment, he spoke. "She's doing better." He responded. Then, he flipped his phone closed. He gave her a weak grin. "You up for pizza?"

She shook her head. "I'll make Ramen for everyone." She said, reaching into a cabinet and pulling out a collection of large pots. She filled them with water and started prepping the noodles. She glanced towards him and grinned. "Wanna grab the canned chicken and some veggies out of there?" She pointed.

When the other's arrived in the common area, Kagome had set up the food on one of the large, battered tables. "POT LUCK!" She called, and several people darted out of the room.

He looked at her in curiosity and she simply grinned. "Pot luck?"

"Pot Luck Friday." She confirmed. "One person on this floor provides the main course. Everyone who eats has to provide something as well. You and Sango are exceptions because you helped me and Sango had to deal with Miroku's groping all evening."

Just then, a resounding slap caused them to look towards the pair that were making their way across the floor. Sango was rubbing her knuckles, a dark blush on her face. Miroku was grinning and rubbing his cheek in an almost affectionate manner.

"Looks like love," They said in unison.

o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o

Two hours, a movie, four 2 Liter soda's and two pots of Ramen later, the room had become a casino, bar, and dance floor. Miroku provided music in the form of his rather expensive stereo and music collection, Kouga, who was visiting was mixing drinks with flare, spinning the shaker and tossing it in the air like a pro.

Inuyasha was startled to notice how easy it would be to become part of this family. Already, he and Sango had been adopted as one of them, even if they had bigger paychecks. It was easy to see who the heads of this family were. Kaede was their mother, and was taking several young bucks to town in a game of poker. Miroku was the older brother, plucking out a tune on his guitar minus amplifier and joking with a few of the guys while eying Sango with distinct interest. Kagome was the younger sister, smiling and laughing as she spoke to a few of the older girls, periodically glancing towards where he sat against a wall.

"You're good for her."

The slightly effeminate male voice made him look away from her. He saw the one Kagome had danced with at the bar. "What do you mean?"

Jakotsu smiled slightly, leaning against the wall, his eyes framed with pink eyeshadow and black eyeliner. "In the time she's been here, she's only ever been close to three guys. Miroku, her younger brother, and me." He flipped a dark gray strand of hair over the shoulder of his tight purple t-shirt. "She's a sweet girl, she deserves to have someone who'll make her happy, who'll support her decisions."

Inuyasha frowned. "She doesn't have any boyfriends?"

"Kouga had a thing for her for awhile, but she turned down all his advances. They're friends, but they're not close. She doesn't walk home with him." He gave the hanyou a meaning look. "Yeah, I know you've been walking our fair Kagome home each night. You're lucky Miroku doesn't know yet. I have the privilege of delivering this message for everyone." He leaned very close to Inuyasha and the hanyou felt his skin crawl. "If you hurt her, there isn't going to be enough of you left for the police to find."

Inuyasha looked at the young man, startled. Jakotsu just gave him a sweet smile and headed towards Kagome, pulling the girl onto the area where everyone was dancing and they began to dance. With a sigh, he walked over to Sango. "How you doing?"

Sango grinned at him. "I haven't had this much fun in ages!" She said, holding her plastic cup full of soda. "Not since COLLEGE! God, to think they do this every WEEK!" She laughed.

He leaned back against the table, watching Kagome dance. "What did you study in college, Sango?" He wondered idly why he'd never asked her that question.

"I majored in business, but I got a minor my parents didn't know about. I minored in music. I love the stuff, and believe it or not, I'm a passable guitarist and have a pretty good singing voice." She crossed her arms. "Why the sudden interest?"

Before he got a chance to answer, Miroku stuck the guitar in her hands. "Let's see what you got." He challenged, wearing a slight grin.

Sango blushed, and sighed, looking at him for help. He grinned and held up his hands. "Go on, I've never heard you play, so I ain't gonna save you."

She glared at him and hopped up on the table, doing some quick adjustments, then began to strum the strings in an upbeat fashion and began to sing. She tapped her foot in the air keeping time and closed her eyes, tuning out the now watching crowd. She sang a song she'd been working out in private, just by ear. "Black Horse and a Cherry Tree" had become one of her favorite songs, because it reminded her a tad too much of the dating game that she'd experienced.

As she finished, the room erupted in applause, and she blushed, passed the guitar back to Miroku quickly. Kagome came running up, grabbing her hands. "That was fantastic!" She exclaimed. Then, she gestured towards Kouga. "Get this woman a beer! She's earned it!"

Inuyasha chuckled at the girl's enthusiasm as Miroku drug the girl away to get her beer. He smiled at Kagome, tilting his head to the side. "You feel better." He commented, grinning when he heard another slap.

"Pot Luck night does that." She leaned back against the wall. She glanced past him, towards Sango. "I like her. She's nice." She grinned at him. "Any other social functions you come to, please bring her along. The other girl's appreciate her because she attracts Miroku's wandering hands away from them, and she's a great musician."

He chuckled, then sobered slightly, remembering Jakotsu's warning. He was growing more than slightly fond of the girl who was standing beside him. Yet, it seemed everything in his life turned to shit eventually. Even with everything he already knew about her, he wanted to know more, and he knew that one day, each of them would have to open wounds on the other that might never be repaired.

Meanwhile, Sango watched the pair, seeing the faint smile on Inuyasha's lips as they spoke, a strange light in his eyes. She sipped her beer, then glanced towards Miroku. "What do you think of those two?"

Miroku blinked. His eyes moved towards Kagome and the silver haired hanyou and he frowned slightly. "I'm not sure. Kagome looks happy enough, and as long as he doesn't hurt her, I don't have a problem with anything going on between them." He paused. "As long as her mother doesn't find out."

The girl looked towards him. "Wouldn't her mother be happy that her daughter found someone who loved her?"

"Kagome's mother wants Kagome to go home and go back to being a little drone of a lawyer or a little drone of a housewife. Her _mother_ is the reason Kagome was drowning herself in Kahlua when you two arrived."

Sango glanced back towards them. "I've never seen Inuyasha that happy." She commented softly. "We both come from money. Got spoon fed through college so to speak. But neither of us got to choose our degrees. In rebellion, I named music my minor, which fortunately, I have some talent for. Inuyasha has always been kinda like a small ship lost at sea. The one fish in the pond that's different. But he doesn't know how to channel it." She shook her head. "Sesshoumaru doesn't help matters."

Miroku sighed, his hand moving stealthily towards Sango's backside. "Such is life."

And the party was ended when Sango hit Miroku so hard he was knocked out.

o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o

Inuyasha dropped Sango off at home first, then headed towards his brother's home. He whistled an upbeat tune, happy that he was going to be walking Kagome to and from work tomorrow, and he had her consent to him treating her to dinner, since she treated him tonight.

He grinned, wondering where he should take her to eat. He almost considered Chez Marc's, but she was a waitress there and he didn't want to see that psycho hostess, anyways. He stopped at a red light, playing with the piece of paper in his pocket that had her phone number. God help him, he couldn't get her out of his head. There was just something about her that drew him like a magnet.

He wasn't sure what it was about her. She was attractive, but he'd seen women that were more beautiful. But when she smiled, she got this glow that caused people to stop and look at her. And the things she said. Always, strange and unexpected things came from her lips. Her eyes shone whenever she spoke about her novel. There was this wonderful, alien, indescribable thing about her that made him want to hold onto her forever.

His eyes widened at the thought. Then, he sighed. A girl who fought to escape the restraints of a life of money wouldn't want to be with someone who had scads of it. He watched as the light turned green and began to accelerate across the lane.

He had just began to cross when a car he never saw coming ran the red light and slammed into the drivers side of his own.

o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o

Kagome hummed cheerfully to herself, listening to the ambient noise from her television, washing dishes from the evening's potluck. She could hear Miroku practicing on his guitar, writing a new song. A wry grin covered her face as she heard his improvised lyrics.

_It was an accident..._

_No need to slap me in the face..._

She giggled as he continued with the chorus, and knew without a doubt this new song was about a girl he'd only met that evening. She found herself humming along and as he sang the chorus, she burst into fresh giggles, till she turned towards the TV.

Time seemed to freeze as she saw the very nearly destroyed automobile, and Inuyasha being wheeled away on a stretcher. Her heart stopped when she noticed how pale and still he was, and how they had a mask over his face, and a tech was squeezing air into her friends lungs.

It had been less than an hour since he and Sango had left. She began frantically searching for the girl as well, almost relieved to notice she wasn't there. Slowly, the world began to move again and she heard the reporter's voice.

"Inuyasha Kurokawa was nearly killed this evening in a hit and run. No information has been released by the police as to a description of the car that nearly ended the life of the businessman, we'll be receiving a statement in the hour..."

The voice droned on and Kagome dropped down to her small love-seat, pulling a pillow into her arms and hugging it tightly. Moments after the scene sunk in, she began to shake. Just before her eyes filled with tears, her door was open and Miroku came running in. "Miroku..."

"You saw..." He came rushing towards her and wrapped her in a hug. "Come on, let's go."

She blinked slowly, looking at him. "Wh-what?"

"To the hospital! They took him to Tokyo General. It was written on the side of the ambulance. If we get there, we might at least be able to find out how he is..."

She nodded weakly, and let Miroku usher her downstairs and into his eighties Volvo. She didn't say anything, but she closed her eyes and sent out a wish, a prayer. _Please let him be okay..._


	5. Chapter 5

Why I Wish I Didn't Love You  
By: DemonSaya

Chapter 5: Unbroken

"I'm sorry, hospital policy says-" The nurse was interrupted by a furious looking young lady.

"You can shove that hospital policy up your-"

"Kagome!"

"I'm going to see him, and if you get in my way, I'll sue you eight ways from next Sunday! He's my FRIEND!" There were tears dancing in the girl's eyes.

The nurse sighed, silently damning hospital policy. "I'm sorry." She said again, this time meaning it. "If you'll leave your name and phone number, I'll contact you when he's come out of surgery, and I'll let you know if he wants to see you." She could tell the girl was about to start yelling again and held up a hand. "Look, I know what you say, but if I let everyone who claimed friendship with a celebrity in, I'd get fired. I'll check with Mr. Kurokawa and contact you."

Kagome's eyes saddened. "Alright." She said softly, and jotted down her and Miroku's names and her phone number and looked at the nurse when she handed it back to her. "Thank you."

As she headed out, another group of people headed in, led by the short bald man, Inuyasha had called Myoga. At the end of the group was Sesshoumaru Kurokawa and Sango. Sesshoumaru paused and glanced towards her. "Miss Higurashi, I presume?"

Kagome swallowed hard and stopped. "Yes." She said calmly. She attempted to read his expression and was disturbed to notice that it was nigh impossible. For someone who made rent by being able to read people it was disturbing. "Yes, Mr. Kurokawa." She took a steadying breath and glanced away.

He frowned slightly. "I'm shocked that you managed to arrive here before my driver." He said, trying to discover the thing about her that his brother was so interested in. There was nothing that extraordinary about the girl. She was dressed in a shabby robe, camisole and cotton pants. On her feet were cheap rubber zori. "How did you manage that?"

She ground her teeth together and she felt Miroku put a restraining hand gently on her arm. "Well, probably because Miroku was breaking every speed limit along the way, and drove on a few sidewalks." She glanced towards the desk. "Unfortunately, we're not permitted to go see him until he verifies that we are indeed friends of his." She couldn't keep the edge out of her voice. Damn him. He was blood related only, they were his FRIENDS!

Sesshoumaru seized her arm and led her rather forcefully to the front. The nurse was explaining that they had a strict 'Family Only' policy to Naraku, who was being rather pushy about them being allowed to see him immediately. Sesshoumaru cleared his throat and Kagome was stunned when all sound in the waiting area stopped. He pinned the nurse down with a look. "Miss Higurashi and I are going to see my brother now." He said calmly.

The nurse flushed, and began to stutter out about policy. She stopped when Sesshoumaru raised his hand for silence.

"I know about the policy. I'm his brother, and I'm taking one of his friends back to see him. If you'll check your policy, you'll see that this is perfectly fine." He arched a fine eyebrow. "Besides, if my brother finds out this woman was here and was sent home, he will have your job, regardless of policy."

The nurse went quiet. "He's not out of surgery." She said softly. "The doctor will let you watch through the window if you tell him you're his brother."

Sesshoumaru nodded and gestured for her to go ahead of him. "Miss Higurashi, if you would?"

She felt every eye in the hospital on her and glanced towards Miroku. "I'll be back soon."

"Give him my best." Miroku agreed.

She nodded and walked through the double doors that opened when the nurse hit a large button on the wall. She was starting to feel sick. It had only been a few hours ago, when they had all been laughing and joking. When they reached the room where they were doing the surgery, Sesshoumaru stepped aside to speak with a doctor who was overseeing the procedure. Kagome stared through the glass, watching as the doctors worked.

"Broken ribs, a broken leg, dislocated..."

Kagome tuned the voice out. Her lower lip trembled and she hugged herself. All she could do was wait until it was over.

o0o0o0o0o

Inuyasha woke to the steady beep of a heart monitor. Besides that, the room was quiet. There was the soft sound of breathing beside his head and pages turning across the room, but besides that-

Who the hell was in his room?

His eyes snapped open and he gasped, seeing the blinding white. It brought the rest of his senses into sharp relief and he realized that he had a splitting headache. A groan escaped him and he put his hands to his head. "Damn..."

"I see you're awake." The voice of his brother was low, almost quiet. As though he were trying not to disturb someone.

Inuyasha opened his eyes more slowly, squinting at his brother. "Why the hell are you whispering?" He rasped. He started to sit up and felt a hand slide down his chest. He blinked, looking down at the small, obviously female hand. Then, he followed it up the arm, till he finally reached the face that was pillowed on the side of his hospital bed.

Kagome was sleeping. In a decidedly uncomfortable looking position. She was wearing a rather worn looking pink terry cloth robe, and white cotton pants with pink cats on them. On her feet were foam rubber zori. Her arm was resting against the bed, bent at an awkward angle, her other resting in her lap.

His face softened and he lightly touched her hand. "How long have I been here?"

"Since last night. Or early this morning, take your pick." Sesshoumaru set the magazine he'd been idly flipping through down and leaned forward. "She arrived about twenty minutes after you did, according to the nurse. She caught the news, I suppose. Reporters are like vultures to a corpse." He looked out the window, at the sun which was high in the sky already. "Nurse wasn't going to let her in. You could say she's the only contraband I'll ever get into a hospital for you."

Inuyasha looked up at his brother in surprise. "You?" He snorted. "You don't even like her."

Sesshoumaru tilted his head to the side. "She speaks like someone who has more than two braincells to rub together. She has a backbone, which is rare, and she actually gave a damn about whether or not you were hurt because she cares about you as a person. She doesn't give a damn about how much money you make." The demon looked towards the sleeping girl. "That in and of itself speaks volumes." He looked back at Inuyasha. "And you would have killed the nurse if you'd found out that she'd been sent away. This causes fewer legal issues." He stood, straightening his suit. "Since you're awake, I'm going to get a coffee. It's been a long night."

Inuyasha winced as the door slammed shut behind his brother and the girl beside him startled so hard, she almost fell out of the chair. He caught her arm and shoulder in his hands, keeping her upright. Her eyes met his and he saw relief, happiness, then something else. Something he didn't recognize, but caused his heart to do a somersault.

"You...you're..." Her lower lip trembled and her hands clenched into fists. "If you _ever _ scare me like that again, I'm going to stab you in the jugular with a dull spoon!" She yelled at him, tears filling her eyes.

Inuyasha backed away a bit, expecting her to beat the hell out of him and was shocked when two arms wrapped around his neck and her lips pressed against his firmly. His lips instantly responded, thankfully, from instinct, because mentally he was reeling. He put his hands lightly on her ribs, gasping for breath when she pulled back, eyes till teary. It took several attempted swallows before his now bone dry mouth and throat were damp enough to utter a word. "Good to see you, too." He managed, stunned.

She blushed a bit, pulling away fully, sitting on the edge of the bed. "I'm serious, Inuyasha. You scared the crap out of me..." She examined the back of her hands like they were the most interesting thing in the world. She looked up shyly when he lightly rested his hand over hers.

"If I didn't know better, I'd almost think that you cared about me, Kagome." He teased her, but his heart did an odd jump when her hand turned in his and wrapped around it. The look on her face was shy and scared and made him want to kiss her senseless. He reached up and gently flicked her nose with his other hand. "I'm fine, Kagome." He said softly, smirking. "Promise."

She nodded, wiping her eyes with the back of her hand. "Miroku was worried too. He told me to give you his best wishes." She shyly scooted off the bed and was about to take her chair when he tugged on her hand. She blushed, dropping it like a hot pan. "S-sorry..."

He didn't. He tugged her back to the bed and his eyes softened. "I don't know what the hell you're apologizing for, but if you go anywhere, I'm going to be very upset." He reached up and tugged on a strand of hair framing her blushing face. There was something in those eyes, a wariness, something he wanted to wipe away. At least when she looked at him. He grinned at her. He was about to say something else when the door to his room opened once again.

Sesshoumaru was leading his co-workers in. The sunuvabitch.

Kagome backed away, pulling her hand from his own, an uncomfortable expression on her face. "I'll see you later..." She headed towards the door, not saying anything else, her back straight. She wasn't ashamed of what she was.

He grinned. "Kagome, call me, okay?" He called after her. "I'll probably need it after this."

A faint smile turned up the corner of her mouth. "Why, more questions?" She lightly teased.

"Naturally."

She laughed, nodding. "I'll talk to you later, Inuyasha." She winked at Sango. "Sango." She walked easily from the room and the door swung shut behind her.

Inuyasha stared at it for several minutes when Naraku's voice brought him back to the present. "Since when do you debase yourself to be friends with wait-staff?"

Inuyasha looked towards Naraku and arched an eyebrow. "Since when is my personal life any of your fucking business?"

Sango and several other people in the room had to fight to smother a laugh. Sesshoumaru rubbed the bridge of his nose with his index finger. "I do apologize for this, Inuyasha, but there is business we need to discuss-"

"Personal or professional?" Inuyasha inquired. "Because seeing as I'm in a hospital bed and not sitting at my desk at work, I'd kinda like to put in for a leave of absence so I don't have to deal with that stupid asshole while I'm recovering."

A strangled giggle escaped a throat. He assumed it was Sango's. Sesshoumaru's mouth was starting to twitch. Yes, there was definitely amusement in the identical gold eyes. "Don't worry, it wont take long. It's about the merger-"

A dangerous flash in his eyes. "What about it?"

"Considering the circumstances, we need to discuss a will that shall be beneficial-" Naraku was stopped when Inuyasha lifted a hand for silence.

Sesshoumaru eyed his brother uncertainly. "Naraku, leave."

"This involves me, too-"

"If you want to live, I suggest you remove yourself from this hospital room." Sesshoumaru snarled when the demon argued. "Everyone, out. Sango may remain, as she sometimes acts as Inuyasha's counsel."

After they filtered from the room, Sesshoumaru pulled out a stack of papers and dropped them on the bed. "I've taken the liberty of having a will drawn up. I had Myoga do it last night, after the accident. Sign it."

Inuyasha picked it up and flipped through it, reading it with practiced ease. It was a standard will, leaving his shares in the company to Sesshoumaru. Nothing to Kagome, nothing to anyone who really meant a damn to him. Nothing about his money. Just the business end of his share of the estate. Without a word, he held the binding between his hands and tore the hefty document in half. "Fuck that." He said firmly.

Sesshoumaru stared at him in blatant shock. "Inuyasha-"

"It's my fucking life, Fluffy. I'll get a will together on my own. And I'm going to do it in a way that Naraku can't touch a single share from my half of the company. I'm not as stupid as you all seem to think." He fisted his hand, remembering the pain as the metal had twisted around him. "Was the bastard who hit me found?"

"No, he ran." He said slowly. "Why?"

"That car didn't have lights on. I didn't see it. I get the impression it was lying in wait." He looked towards Sango. "Someone was _trying_ to kill me." His hands shook in anger. "So I'll write a will, but I'm going to be smart about it. And I seriously recommend you are, too, Fluffy. So that Naraku doesn't latch onto our father's company and ruin the Kurokawa name."

o0o0o0o0o

Kagome was walking home from work later that night, the first time she'd been alone since last night. The first time she'd really had to think about exactly what she'd done in Inuyasha's hospital room seconds after she woke.

She could blame the kiss on her sleep muddled brain, but she'd be lying. She could blame it on the relief that had surged through her, but that would be a lie, too. She could blame anything she wanted that wasn't her heart, and it wouldn't be the truth. Was she tired still, sure, was she glad he was okay, yeah. None of that was why she kissed him.

She'd kissed him because she was scared she wouldn't get another chance.

Trembling fingers rose and lightly pressed against her lips.

Thinking about Inuyasha brought all the events of the past week to light and reminded her of why she'd been wary of him in the beginning. It was the same reason she was only close to a handfull of other men. Just a few scant days and suddenly, her barriers that kept men, especially men like Inuyasha, at a distance were beginning to dissolve.

She hadn't kissed a man since Hojo.

That was four years ago.

She rubbed her shoulder, uncertain of what to do. She'd be able to explain the kiss away to Inuyasha if she had to. It was herself she was having trouble convincing. After all, when his lips had softened and started moving against hers, her knees had grown weak and she'd been enjoying herself. Unintentionally she licked her lower lip. It still felt a little swollen from the kiss they'd shared.

A shiver went through her that didn't have anything to do with the chill in the air from approaching autumn. She was scared, plain and simple. She was completely and totally petrified that she was starting to fall in love with someone she couldn't have. She entered the apartment and found Miroku waiting there for her, as usual. She looked at her friend and saw a small smile of understanding on his lips.

"Hi, Kagome. How are you feeling?"

She considered lying, but he would know. He always knew. So she told him the truth. "Like someone just kicked the world out from under my feet and I'm in free fall." She said bluntly. She didn't complain when he put his arms around her shoulders and led her up the stairs.

"We'll talk in your apartment." He promised, waving everyone away as they peeked out, asking how Inuyasha was. When she managed after her fourth try to unlock her door, he pushed her inside and walked to her kitchen, getting a bottle of Kahlua and milk, dropping a few cubes of ice in two glasses and then fixing their drinks. "Okay, darlin', what's wrong?" He asked, resting the glass on the table in front of her.

Kagome turned the glass on the table, staring down into the coffee-colored liquid. "Inuyasha woke up..." She said, changing the topic only slightly.

"I see..."

The way his voice trailed off made her head jerk up. He really did. He knew. He already knew!

Somehow, that made talking about it easier. "I was going off on him for scaring the crap out of me, and then..." She felt her hands shaking and took a healthy swig of the drink to try to calm her nerves. "I kissed him." She whispered, biting her lip.

Miroku made a sound like he was choking. "You-you what?!" He stuttered, floored for the first time that night. He sat down beside her, turning her to him, searching her miserable face. "You kissed him? Mouth to cheek or what?"

She flushed, looking away from Miroku's concerned gaze. "On the mouth."

"Oh, Kagome..." Miroku hugged her. "Thank god." He started laughing a bit, petting the girl's hair. "Girl, you had us scared that little prick broke that part of you!" He pushed her away, smiling at her brightly. "But it still works!"

"What are you talking about?" She asked, frowning.

"You're ass of an ex! Hojo! He didn't break you! You're..." Miroku laughed, pulling her to her feet and dancing around the apartment with her. "You can still love! He didn't ruin it for you! We've been worried because you never showed interest in anyone, we thought you'd never feel like that again, but you can, and you do! Thank god for that jackass of a hanyou!"

Kagome stopped him. "Miroku, this isn't funny!" She grabbed his shoulders. "I'm not like them, I can never be like them...If...If I fall for him...It'll be like with Hojo, I just know it...and then I really will be broken..." Her lower lip trembled and she felt tears in her eyes. "I can't go through it again, I just can't-"

He gently rested his hands on her shoulders. "Kagome, maybe you should talk to him." He gave her a warm smile. "After all, if you tell him now, and he only wants to be your friend, then you know, and it'll be easier."

She sighed, nodding. "I was going to go to the hospital tomorrow-"

The phone rang shrilly and Kagome tensed, looking towards it. Miroku lightly kissed her forehead and headed towards the door. "Relax. You're strong. Don't let them get you down."

She nodded, walking to the phone and picking it up on the third ring. "911, what's your emergency?" She asked a mask of calm laced through her voice.

"Kagome!" Her mother scolded. "You're manners are better than that-"

She sighed, leaning against the wall. "Mom, if you don't like how I answer the phone, don't call me. It might give both of us a much better night." She twirled the phone cord around a finger. "So, what brings you to actually dial the ten digit number to reach me?"

There was a moment's hesitation on the other end. "When are you coming to visit next?" She asked slowly. "Hojo would really like to see you-"

"I don't want to see him, and if you invite him over while I'm there, I'll never come back, get it?" She bit out.

"He's a nice boy-"

"He's NOT a nice boy." She snapped, fury racing through her.

"And he can take care of you-"

"I can take care of myself-"

"He loves you-"

Kagome snapped. Something inside her turned to ice. "Mom, I'm not going to come home and be a little housewife to make you and Hojo happy. It's _my_ life. Stop trying to run it." She growled, then hung up the phone.

A strange feeling surged through Kagome. It was power. She'd just taken control back from her mother. She'd reached out, and with one hand, snatched the control she'd been losing back into herself. Funny how having people who care for you can do that.

Funny how being in love can do that.

She lifted her face to the roof and hugged herself. Whatever happened with Inuyasha, she wasn't going to let go of this control again. It was her life. No one was going to direct it for her ever again. One hand lifted and she ran her fingers over her lips again. From now on, whatever happened, she was in control.

o0o0o0o0o

_AN: Wow...wasn't expecting this to be so popular. Here's another chapter for all the little boys and girls who've been loyally reading. Sorry this chapter took me so long to finish. I went up against a mild writers block for awhile, especially with this chapter. I should have the fifth chapter of AMCS up soon, and I'll try to get to work on some of my other unfinished stories. Thanks for reading, and as usual, love it, hate it, ect, click the little box down at the bottom and let me know! Love, peace and kisses, -DemonSaya-_


	6. Chapter 6

Why I Wish I Didn't Love You

By: DemonSaya

Chapter 6: Learning to Fall

The papers had been written up in haste, with Myoga and Sango looking at him in stunned silence the entire time they put the document together. There were no loopholes in the will, nor in the trusts attached to it. He simply stared out the window, a faint smirk on his face as he spoke. His shares in the company were happily divided between as many people as possible, his position expressly left to Sesshoumaru. He left most of his belongings to Sango and Shippou, a young man who was going to wind up inheriting is own father's company.

His money he left to an object.

He left it to the Building of the Starving Artists. He intended for it to be purchased, then given, free of charge, to it's occupants. They wouldn't have to scrape up the money for rent ever again.

"Sesshoumaru isn't going to like this." Sango said softly, when the small lawyer had left. She laced her fingers together, resting her elbows on her knees, looking at him from under her eyebrows.

"Keh, like I care. It's my damn life." Inuyasha stared out the window at the cloud covered sky. "This isn't about what he wants. It's about what I want." His hand reached up, lightly touching his lips. A strange yearning filled him and he watched closely as the first raindrops fell on the window. "Sango, I need to tell you something in confidence. It can't leave this room."

Sango examined her boss and friend for a long moment, then nodded.

0o0o0o0o0o0o0

Kagome returned to the hospital each day following, but her courage always seemed to fail at the entrance of his door. She'd see him laying there, eyes closed and the rabbit inside would take control and she'd run away.

Okay, maybe taking control of her life was easy. Taking control of her fear was not. She was desperately uncertain about seeing him after what had happened last time they were together. Deeply etched into her mind was the feeling of his lips against hers. Coward that she was, she didn't want to hear him tell her that it could never happen. She knew that. Dammit, she knew.

Today, however, would be different. Today had to be.

She walked to the hospital room and took a steadying breath, not looking through the little window that would allow her to see the boy in the room. Instead, she rested her hand on the door and slowly pushed it open.

Only to find a nurse making the bed. Her breath caught. "Where's Inuyasha?"

"He was discharged last night." The nurse said calmly, not even looking up.

"Oh..." Her heart fell and she backed from the room, closing the door. She was too late. He was already gone. She fumbled, pulling her cell phone from her pocked and examined it closely. No missed calls.

He hadn't called.

Kagome sighed sadly, then closed it, slipping it into her pocket. Today was her only day off this week. She'd been looking forward to seeing him again, despite the fear. Looking forward to spending the day with him. She walked from the hospital and out onto the street, looking around, despite knowing he wouldn't be there.

She sighed, resigning herself to an uneventful night at home, and started heading up the street, back to her apartment. She barely noticed the rain as it started to fall around her, only shivering a bit at the chill.

As she walked, police cars screamed in the opposite direction, followed by a fire truck.

She shivered, rubbing roughly at her arms to get the blood circulating properly again. When she reached the apartment, she jogged up the stairs and ducked into her apartment. She threw off her soaked clothing, donning her favorite sweats and her faded terrycloth robe and warmest slippers.

Wrapping her hair in a towel, she headed into her kitchen, filling her kettle with water for tea.

She walked to the small window and stared outside at the overcast sky, glad to be in her warm dry apartment. It felt like autumn was coming on fast, and she sighed softly. Her birthday would be soon, and it looked like it would once again be spent hiding in her apartment, trying to pretend that she wasn't twenty-five and alone.

Maybe she'd get the day off from work and start on that damn novel...

The tea kettle shrilled and she hurried to pull it off the stove. Picking her favorite herbal tea, she poured the hot water over the tiny silk bag and hummed softly to herself. She drug her computer chair by the window and watched as the city lights winked on, one-by-one.

A sharp bang on her door pulled her out of her thoughts and she blinked, jumping when the noise repeated. Miroku was working, Kaede had gone out to market. She was pretty much alone in the building. She grabbed her gun, hiding it behind her back and crept to the door. She wrenched it open and let out a shriek when someone fell against her, pushing her back into the apartment and knocking her only weapon from her hands.

The man's hair was black. She could tell it was a man because no breasts pressed against her chest. He was also bleeding rather badly. "Oh, shit..." She whispered, adjusting her hold on whoever had nearly knocked down her door. "Oh shit..."

"K'gome..."

The pained sound filtered upwards to her ears and she wrenched the towel from her hair, wrapping it around the dripping form. "Come on, it's okay..." She urged, leading him into her bathroom. The long wet hair clung lightly to her skin. It was soft. "Come on, sit-"

Hands caught her arms tightly and she found herself staring into violet eyes. But the shape, the face, they were too familiar to ignore. "I-Inuyasha?" She whispered, dumbstruck.

He was shivering. His eyes were dazed. His clothing was soaked. Most of it was probably also ruined. "Hurts..." He complained, resting his head against the tile wall.

"I'll be right back..." She whispered. Then, she pressed a light kiss to his forehead and ran to her living room, closing her door with a slam and throwing the bolt quickly. She also locked the chain to be safe. She didn't know what had happened, or why Inuyasha was there, but there he was, bleeding on the floor of her bathroom.

She ran to her closet, pulling down her first aid kit and some extra towels. There, and for all practical purposes, human. He was going to have to explain that one to her. When she found everything she needed, she headed back to the bathroom, finding him still sitting against the tile wall.

"Bloody hell..." He mumbled when warm hands touched his icy skin. He forced his eyes open and found himself looking into blue eyes that were darkened slightly to gray. "Hiya..." He tried to smirk, but it hurt too much.

Kagome gave a weak excuse for a smile and began peeling off the leather jacket. "Come on, I'll treat the wounds..." She said. It was the only thing she could think to say. When the jacket was laying in a pile in the corner of the room, she started to work on the t-shirt he wore under it. It was sticking to his skin and the wounds, so she gave up and ripped it down the middle.

A rough chuckled stopped her. She looked up and saw his hazy eyes looking at her with amusement. A dark blush colored her face and she looked away, opening the shirt and wincing. Gently, she eased the shirt off his shoulders. His skin looked partially melted, and the areas that were bleeding looked dark and infected. Gently, she touched one of the dark areas and blinked when the skin lightened and looked distinctly less pussy. "What happened to you?" She whispered, her face sad.

"Somebody's trying to kill me. Would have succeeded if I wasn't near here..." He groaned when her warm little hand prodded a wound gently. "Fucking human night..." He muttered.

She wasn't imagining it. The wounds she touched were lightening. "You'll have to explain that to me later." She said, reaching for the fly of his pants, jumping when hands grasped her wrists gently. She looked up and saw amusement.

"I promise, there aren't any wounds down there."

She flushed, and huffed. "Then take them off yourself and cover your bits with a towel." She snapped at him, tossing a towel in his face. She walked to the shower and turned the water on, testing the temperature with her wrist. When it was warm, she hesitantly glanced back at the boy leaning against the wall.

He had a towel draped carelessly over his lap, but besides that he was naked. He was staring aimlessly at the wall.

Kagome walked over and gently pulled his arm over her shoulder, helping him get to the bath. "Clean up. I'll see if I can find you some clean clothes." She said, then left him there. She cleaned up the blood with another towel and then dumped it in the pile of laundry rapidly forming in her hall. Then, she found her spare key to Miroku's apartment and went to raid her best friends closet.

Inuyasha, meanwhile, sat under the warm spray, letting it hit his human body, staring at his human hands. He wasn't lying when he said his proximity to this apartment had saved his life. He wouldn't have made it to the hospital in time for them to treat the wounds sustained from the Miasma, and it seemed the ones Kagome had been checking were significantly better already. That could only mean she had miko blood. Idly, he wondered if the little waitress knew.

He closed his eyes, taking steady breaths. He could still remember the feel of her hands tearing the shirt off of him. It made him smile, brought things to mind that he hadn't thought of since puberty. His forehead tingled from where her lips had lightly pressed. Idly, he wondered why she hadn't returned to the hospital to visit him.

The door to the bathroom opened and he heard the sound of someone moving around. "Kagome?" He asked quietly.

"Hm." Came the response. "I borrowed some sweats from Miroku. They should be about the right size." A moments hesitation. "Are you alright?"

"Do you actually care?" His voice came out a bit more cross than he'd intended. She hadn't cared enough to visit him in the hospital.

The voice went cold. "I'm leaving them on the counter."

He sighed, lightly smacking the back of his head against the side of the shower stall. When the door closed, he grabbed the towel and wrapped it around himself, carefully drying the wounds. He found the sweats and a pair of clean boxers and put the boxers and pants on, leaving his chest bare. It would only reopen the wounds if he wore anything against them.

He toweled his hair, staring at himself in the fogged mirror. One hand wiped some of the fog away and he sighed. "You're a complete asshole." He muttered, fighting the urge to slam his fist into the mirror and break it. There was no point procrastinating. He wrapped the damp towel around his shoulders and left the bathroom, finding Kagome sitting at the coffee table, a steaming cup of tea clasped between her hands. There was another sitting on it, an obvious invitation. "I'm sorry." He said, moving around the couch and sitting beside her, pulling the mug towards himself.

She didn't speak at first, simply sipped her cup. "How could you ask that?" She asked softly. "How can you think..." She bit her lip furiously. "Of course I care. You're my friend." She looked towards him, hurt evident on her face.

He stared into his mug, sniffing the tea that should have smelled stronger than it did. With a sigh, he looked towards her. "I'm an asshole, Kagome." He said bluntly. "I'm an asshole and I have a foul temper, especially when I'm like this." He drained half of the tea, relishing the feel of it scalding his throat.

She looked back at the table. "How did you wind up like this, anyways?" She glanced towards his chest, seeing the wounds she'd touched had nearly faded but the others were still dark and rather frightening.

He set the cup back on the table. If they talked about this, it would change things. Things were already changing, but if he didn't talk about this, they would stop, and it would keep things comfortable. Familiar. If he shared this part of himself, this part that he hadn't shared with anyone outside his family, it would change things. He slowly looked at her and saw a concerned look on her face and his decision was made.

It was worth it.

"I'm a hanyou, Kagome. My mother was human. Once a month, a hanyou's demon blood wanes and his human blood becomes dominant." He said softly. "Mine occurs on the night of the new moon. When the sun comes up, I'll be a hanyou again."

"I...I didn't know that." She admitted. She saw the awkward expression on his face and realized he'd never told anyone.

He shifted uncomfortably. "Truth is, most people don't. Hanyou tend to be on guard that night, they hide, because they're vulnerable. It's not as bad anymore, but a long time ago, hanyou were hunted by humans and youkai, and they were killed. I guess it's been written into our genetic code to hide this kind of thing viciously." He looked away to hide the blush forming on his face. "You...you're the first person outside of my family to know this." He admitted.

Kagome's eyes widened at the admission. Blushing, she stared into her tea. She wasn't sure how to respond to that. She could feel him shaking and looked towards him, seeing him looking into his empty mug. Gently, she reached over and brushed the hair back from his face. Her hand stilled when she saw the faint flush. "Inuyasha..."

He looked towards her, about to say he should go when her lips lightly touched his. His breath sighed out of him and he caught her hand, threading his fingers through hers. Neither of them deepened the kiss, and that was okay. When they parted, Inuyasha looked at her, his eyes shaded slightly. "Why?"

"I don't know." Kagome admitted, not pulling her hand from his. There were emotions clouding her eyes. Emotions he couldn't read.

He didn't like not being able to read her. "Why didn't you come to visit me? You promised."

"Why didn't you call me?" She shot back.

He squirmed uncomfortably. His eyes refused to meet hers. Finally, he sighed, looking at her in the face. She was surprised by the depth of honesty in his eyes. "Because I wasn't sure I wanted us to get too close."

Her eyes went wide from shock. "What...?"

A sigh escaped him and he pulled his hand from hers, standing and starting to pace. "It was fine, you know. We weren't friends, I just walked you back here, and asked you a bunch of questions. Not personal questions..." He threw up his hands in frustration. "Friendly, but not friends. Then, before I knew what was happening, you _were_ my friend. I don't have a lot, in case you didn't notice."

He paused briefly, his face torn, confused. "I liked spending time with you, and it seemed that you liked spending time with me. We could talk easily, and that's not something I'm used to, and I started liking it. I _liked_ being able to talk freely, about whatever was on my mind, about anything I wanted..." He looked down at her, his face tired, frustrated. "You weren't fake. I wasn't used to that..."

Her face softened and a small smile turned up the corners of her lips. "Inuyasha..."

"The more time I spend with you, the more time I WANT to spend with you, and I'm starting to worry...that if we get closer...I wont want to leave." He resumed pacing. "I've been going over this again and again in my head. You like where you are, you like what you do. You enjoy the life you live. I remember what happened to my mother when dad drug her into this world I live in. It destroyed her. I can't do that to you..." Pain filled him and he fisted his hands. "I can't."

Kagome felt tears dancing in her eyes. She forced herself to stare at the carpet. What was she supposed to say to that? He liked her, he admitted as much. But he 'couldn't' be with her. She fought the urge to laugh. "You can stay here for the night." She said mechanically. "I'm kind of tired, so I should go to-" Hands gently touched her shoulders and she fiercely bit her lip. "I'm going to bed." She said, standing and walking down the hall.

Miroku was right. It was better that this happened now. Better now than later, when she may have fallen for him fully. Better now, when she could still hold together the pieces of a broken heart.

She hesitated at the entrance of her room and glanced down the hall, finding him kneeling in the same place on the floor, his head lowered. "Goodnight." She offered, her eyes sad.

There was a snort from the hanyou turned human in her living room. No other response. So she opened the door to her room and walked in, closing it behind her. Tears filled her eyes once again and she lay on her bed, facing towards her window, curling up and crying.

0o0o0o0o0o0o0

Kagome's phone rang shrilly, pulling her out of her uneasy sleep. She put the phone to her ear and yawned. "House of God, Moses speaking..."

There was a sound that distinctly reminded her of a snort. "Kagome, that's just wrong."

Her face turned up into a slight smile. "Souta..." She said softly, snuggling deeper into her covers. "What's up?"

"Insomnia." The boy said. "I drank eight coffee's at dinner. Hojo came over. I told mom it was either caffeine or I start smoking a pack a day." Her brother was smiling on the other end, she could tell. "Don't you know some guy called Inuyasha Kurokawa?"

"Hmmm..." She agreed. Of course she'd talked to Souta about him. He wouldn't go blabbing to her mother. "Why?"

"Because he died yesterday."

Kagome jerked upright, her eyes going wide. "What?!" She asked, hands fisting in her blankets. "What are you talking about?"

"I'm watching JNN. It's Breaking News. At three pm, Inuyasha Kurokawa was involved in an explosion that wounded several civilians. He is now missing, presumed dead-"

Kagome went deathly still. That explained the wounds. But that didn't explain how said demon was presently human and sleeping on her couch. "Souta. I'll call you back later." She said softly. She hung up the phone and sprang out of bed. She didn't bother grabbing her robe or slippers, merely ran into the living room, wearing nothing but an over-sized t-shirt.

The television was on, set to the anime network, volume very low. The boy was laying on her couch, eyes closed in sleep, his mouth hanging slightly open. The faint sound of him snoring was barely noticeable over the tv and sounds of Miroku practicing next door. Kagome flopped down on the floor by his head.

Gently, she brushed some hair from his face. The action caused him to stir and his eyes opened slowly. "Turn it to the news." She said softly, seeing the surprise on his face.

He groaned, flipping it to the news and rolled away from the TV. Till he heard his name announced. His head whipped back and he stared wide-eyed at the news.

"Inuyasha Kurokawa is missing, presumed dead after a gas main exploded this afternoon, wounding several..."

They sat in silence, watching the news for several minutes until it changed to a different story. Then, Kagome switched the television off. "Why do they think you're dead?" She asked, resting her hands on the TV. "Surely your brother-"

He coughed softly. "My brother knows it's my human night. If I'm not there, I'm dead as far as he, as far as anyone knows."

She looked at him, stunned. "What about your phone, they'd have tried to call-"

"It got busted when I landed." He said. He didn't sound sorry. Hell, he didn't sound worried. There was actually a trace of relief in his voice.

"Inuyasha, they're probably worried sick, why haven't you called anyone?!"

He looked at her, seeing confusion on her face. "I didn't think about it till now." He admitted, looking down at his hands. A phone was shoved into it and he frowned, looking up at her.

"Call him." She said softly.

He started to dial, then stopped. He stared at the beginnings of his brother's number and then looked at the girl standing over him. If he finished dialing this number, he would have to go back to the rat race. If he didn't, if he hung up, he might have a chance at more. A chance with her. Slowly, he hung up the phone and tossed it behind him. "No." He said softly.

Kagome stared at him in shock. "But-"

Inuyasha silenced her by grabbing her wrists and pulling her against his chest. He heard her breath rush out of her and winced when the t-shirt scrubbed against the still oozing sores. Without another word, he wrapped his arms around her and pressed his lips against hers. Her hands flexed slightly against his chest, nails digging through the fabric and into his skin. He coaxed her gently, slipping one hand into her fragrant hair, trailing the other down her spine. When the need for air out-weighed the need to continue the kiss, he rested his forehead against hers. "If I go back, I can't keep you." He whispered.

Kagome's eyes flew wide at that and she pulled back a bit, hands resting on his shoulders. She searched his gaze, seeing desperation there. "You can't hide forever." She whispered back, cupping his face gently.

He smirked. "I can try." He said, pulling her mouth back to his, drowning in her kiss.

0o0o0o0o0o0o0

_AN: Wow! Another chapter! Yay! Everyone, do a happy dance! LOL This is actually something I've been planning for awhile, I just wasn't sure how I was going to swing it. I like it this way for now, but that might change. Until/if it does, here ya go. Thankies to everyone who reviewed last chapter, and those people who think this piece of freewriting is good enough to fav! Love ya'll to pieces! And as usual, please leave a note telling me what you think! I love to hear from you! Love, Peace, and puppy-eared dog demons!_


	7. Chapter 7

Why I Wish I Didn't Love You

By: DemonSaya

Chapter 7: Playing Dead

Reporters were a terrible bother. They always had been. Now, as he peered at them through the dark tinted glass of his limo, he realized that they were worse than a terrible bother. They were parasites. Creatures he would have crushed five hundred years ago, like the leaches they were. He was tired. This mess with the accident a week ago, and the explosion the night before, he could now understand why Inuyasha suspected foul play. It was a little too convenient.

Ordinarily, he would have had the driver pull around back, but he suspected every entrance was swarmed just as badly as this one.

Sesshoumaru pulled out his shades, slipping them on and pushed open the door, stepping onto the pavement, straightening and looking around. Yes, every news person in town, every paparazzi, every gossip column writer. Vermin. He swept past them, ignoring their questions and stopping at the entrance. He turned when a particular question caught his ears. "Repeat that...?"

"Now that your brother is dead, you stand to control the rest of the company stock. Will you be getting a new partner to ease the load-"

Sesshoumaru felt amusement run through him. "I believe the first question is 'whoever said my brother is dead'..." He dusted some imaginary lint off his clothes and straightened. "And as for the 'partner' comment, no. This has always been a Kurokawa business. None other than a Kurokawa will have their name on the door." Then he swept inside, the door closing with finality behind him.

"Kurokawa-san."

The soft feminine voice caught his attention. He turned, finding a woman with dark hair swept up into a twist, wearing tasteful makeup, a dark green pantsuit, with black pumps, over a pale pink blouse. It took looking into blue-gray eyes for him to realize who he was looking at. "Higurashi-san..."

She bowed politely. "If I may have a word."

Proper speech, back straight, even in the presence of someone like him. Yes, she had pride that would rival his brothers. "He hasn't contacted me." He said evenly. "He'll likely contact you first if he's among the living."

"I'm aware. That's why I'm here." She noticed several people looking at her and had to swallow hard to gain control of herself. "Please."

Sesshoumaru noticed her discomfort and nodded. "Very well, Higurashi-san. Follow me." He swept towards an elevator and was mildly impressed to find that she could keep up with his gait, despite her heals. Oh, yes, he could see why his brother had chosen her. Brains, determination, pride, and that spark of unknown would have been an intoxicating mix for the hanyou.

Once the elevator doors opened, Kagome was mildly amused to watch those in it scramble out like roaches, and those waiting seemed to not notice as this one left. Once they were safe inside, she was about to start when Sesshoumaru lifted a hand, indicating silence. She frowned, noting several cameras.

"You request privacy. The only two rooms in the building not heavily monitored are my office and Inuyasha's. My employees, though loyal, are mainly human, and flawed. There are many who would like the information you wish to give me and would pay handsomly to get it."

"Money is the root of all evil." Kagome quipped, as the elevator doors opened once again, admitting them to the top floor, which was bustling furiously. She saw the grim expression on Sesshoumaru's face and blinked. Then, she heard murmurs following behind her, commenting on the cheep, polyester look of her suit, her homely appearance, and people wondering what on earth she had to do with someone like Sesshoumaru.

"Sir, Naraku's waiting in your office!" Jaken piped up, giving Kagome a sneer of disgust.

Sesshoumaru picked up Jaken and peered at him. "You let him...into my private office, with no one to monitor him?"

"Well, he's never done any harm before-"

Kagome watched the toad hit the wall with a sickening splat. Suddenly, the somewhat amused demon who reminded her faintly of Inuyasha was gone. Left in his place was a rutheless businessman. "Sango, I expect to see you in my office in five minutes. Myoga, go clean out the confrence room. I'll deal with this parasite myself..." He turned towards her. "Follow behind me, and keep that attitude you seem so fond of. If you're on the top floor of this building, you'll need it."

Then the man-turned beast swept into his office and she followed behind him, wincing when she noticed Naraku sitting in the big chair behind the desk, his eyes closed.

"Quite a nice office you have for yourself, old friend..."

Sesshoumaru snarled. "Naraku, never, have I held our meetings in this room. Always have they been held in the confrence room. Now get out, before I call my biggest, meanest bull demon security guards to come and throw you out of my building."

Naraku paled and swallowed, standing and moving towards the door. He looked at her, frowned deeply. "Do you deepthroat?"

Kagome smiled slightly. "Do you?"

Sesshoumaru heard the return statement and pinched the bridge of his nose until he heard the door shut. Then he pressed a button, and suddenly all sound from outside the office cut off. Then he started shaking. He didn't turn towards her. Just kept one hand on the bridge of his nose and trembled furiously. When he finally got himself under control, he began thoroughly checking over his office, making sure nothing was missing or out of place. "I can see why my brother finds you so interesting." He said dryly, taking his seat when he was finally satisfied.

Kagome smiled faintly. "I'll take that as a compliment." She sat primly in on of the armchairs, knees together, breifcase in her lap.

"Where is my brother, Higurashi-san?"

She smiled faintly. "You mean your nose didn't pick him up in your lobby?" She flipped open the breifcase. "Last night, he arrived at my apartment door, hurt rather badly." She produced his leather jacket, spreading it out across the desk so he could see the damage. "I learned later, the media is assuming him to be dead, and for the time being, he would like it to stay that way."

Sesshoumaru arched an eyebrow. "And why should I? He owes this company more than he knows. This is where his lawyer is-" The door opened, admitting Sango, who looked weary and her eyes were swollen. "Speaking of which...Sango, please sit..."

Sango took the other chair and looked towards the girl who sat opposite her, dressed prim and proper. It took staring at her for several moments, barely hearing Sesshoumaru speak before she jumped up and pointed. "KAGOME?!"

Kagome smiled faintly. "Hello, Sango."

"You are aquainted?" Sesshoumaru frowned.

The waitress smiled at them. "Seeing as I've waited on several of your business dinners and am friends with your son, isn't that a strange question to ask?"

"Friends?" Both Sesshoumaru and Sango arched an eyebrow. They were rewarded with a faint blush.

Kagome lowered her eyes. "It's complicated. Inuyasha and I haven't known each other very long. At the moment, he's staying on my couch. He's planning on staying until the calms down, barring any...changes." She said calmly, lifting her gaze. She saw a slight frown on Sango's face and smiled. "Miroku misses you." She teased lightly, rewarded with a blush from the girl, and a look of concealed interest on Sesshoumaru's face.

Sesshoumaru processed the information and frowned deeply. "So Inuyasha still believes someone is threatening his life..." The demon sighed, shaking his head. "The circumstances have begun to convince me of such as well. It's too coincidental, that immediately following his release from the hospital, he's in yet another accident. You saw these wounds?"

Kagome remembered the shape he'd been in initially and shuddered. She'd almost lost him the night before. Again. She took a deep breath before she started. "I lived at a shrine, prior to moving into the city. I recognized the wounds. No fire caused those. They were caused by jyaki or shouki. My powers...neutralized some of them." She saw that both were digesting this information and went silent.

Sesshoumaru slotted that information away and took a deep breath. A miko. Of course. Inuyasha, having had a miko for a mother would undoubtedly gravitate to a miko for a mate. And this poor naiive girl thought they were just going to stay friends. He examined her closely, and saw she was wearing a calm expression on her face, while her eyes were turbulent and bordering on panicked. As though everything she knew about the world was being turned end over end and she was having a tough time with it.

Idly, he wondered how long it had been since she'd been with a man that wasn't a friend, and found he had the answer before he finished the thought.

A very long time.

"Well, Higurashi-san..." Sesshoumaru pulled out a few papers, skimming them. "if my brother doesn't wish to be known as living, should I have him declared dead?"

"No." Kagome said quietly. "He doesn't want declared dead either. He was thinking about something more like witness protection. Just going underground for awhile. Honestly, I think he needs it." She wrung her hands out. "He's not comfortable in his own skin and he wants to find a bit of his own place in the world, rather than the mould his inheritance fit him in."

Sesshoumaru saw sad understanding on Sango's face and knew the other woman agreed with this assessment. "Very well." He laced his fingers together. "Since he's made you his representative, he's your problem now, Higurashi-san. Sango." He turned towards his brother's best friend and felt a hint of wicked glee. "I'm appointing you to the job of bodyguard to my troublemaker of a brother. That said, you're going to live in that building with them."

Sango stared at Sesshoumaru and stood. "But, my job here-"

"Can wait. You were my brother's legal aide and secretary. Since my brother has...gone to ground, you're fired." He watched her jaw drop and smirked. "Unless you'd prefer remaining here...arrainging papers and sharpening pencils and filing documents."

It took several long minutes of consideration before she realized that she was being offered the opportunity to go to ground as well. "I'll do my best, Kurokawa-san." She stood, bowing deeply.

"Very well." He stood and watched as his brother's woman stood as well, bowing equally as deeply. "Get out of here. Sango, try to pretend you're distraught." He watched the woman grin and then leave and sat at his desk, looking at his brother's destroyed leather jacket. He would contact the person who made it and get a replacement for the hanyou. Then, a particularly wicked grin turned up the corners of his mouth. "Well, little brother, you want to find out how the other half lives, you will. With all the bells and whistles."

He picked up the phone and dialed a number quickly. "This is Sesshoumaru Kurokawa. Yes. I'd like you to freeze all of Inuyasha's assets. Just in case."

0o0o0o0o0o0o0

Inuyasha looked up as Sango and Kagome left the elevator, both giggling furiously. He blinked, moving towards them, the hood of the sweatshirt hiding his ears and hair. "Hey."

Sango looked at him, then looked around, without a word, she drug the two from the building. They made it past the reporters withouth them giving them more than a passing glance. When they were a block away from the company building, Sango stopped, turning towards him and proceded to check him over for wounds. "You scared the hell out of us, dog boy!" She hissed, when she verified that he was fine.

He saw Kagome standing off to the side, smiling faintly and grinned back. "Good to see you too. Why'd Fluffy let you off early?"

Kagome linked an arm through each of theirs. "He fired her from her current position, rehiring her as your personal bodyguard." She grinned towards him. "Which means she's going to be living with one of my neighbors."

Sango blinked. "Who are your neighbors?"

Inuyasha winced. "Ouch..." He shook his head. "Ask Kaede first."

"Wait, whose the other neighbor?!"

Kagome grinned wickedly at her. "Miroku."

"WHAT?!"

They talked all the way back to the apartments, where Kagome got Sango settled onto Kaede's couch. "Welcome to the apartment of the starving artists." Kagome whispered, smiling. She gave the girls shoulders a squeeze, and accepted the tea from Kaede, who was eyeing Inuyasha and Sango with interest.

"We didn't see you at that potluck..." Sango said, uneasily.

Kaede smiled. "I'm not young enough to party with the youngsters, but I have my uses around the building."

"Mainly, she makes the best menstrual teas I've ever had. Including anything that we ever had at my home." Kagome said, giving her a knowing look, ignoring Inuyasha's discomfort. She made herself comfortable on the floor, tucking her feet under her. "She makes lots of excelent brews, and is a great cook. When we need something more hearty than instant ramen or cold cereal, we know where to go."

They lapsed into a long silence as they drank their tea, until finally, Sango looked at Inuyasha. "Now what? You have disappeared from public eye, for now at least. Now what?"

Inuyasha leaned back against a wall, sighing. "Well, if I know my brother, he'll have some petty revenge, like seizing my assets, so that no one can use them. Which means I'll need a job." He ran a hand through his hair and sighed. "And if I want to stay out of the public eye, it has to be something discrete."

Kagome inclined her head. "Kouga is getting married next week..." She said easily. "He's planning on taking quite a bit of time off for the honeymoon as well." She saw Inuyasha looking at her speculatively. "Marc's been meaning to hire another bartender for nights, because that's when the majority of alcohol is ordered, and Kouga's fast, but sometimes, we get complaints that people had to wait too long." She chewed on her lip. "Marc wouldn't advertise. He values his employees too much. And everytime there's a business dinner, it's held in the VIP lounge."

Sango blinked. "That's not a bad idea, Inuyasha..."

The demon sighed. "I don't know. I kinda stand out..." He tugged on his long silver hair and dog ears.

Kaede smiled. "There's always hair dye, Inuyasha."

Everyone in the room whipped around, staring at her. Kagome giggled a little bit, then shook her hair. "No...I don't know what that would do on a demon. And it smells bad. But a wig and contacts could cover all the big issues during work." She saw that he still looked uncertain and glanced away. "Kaede, Sango, I'm going to excuse myself. I need to get ready for work." She stood, walking towards the door.

Sango glared at the hanyou, while Kaede gave Kagome a peck on both cheeks and whispered a blessing to her before she left. When only the three of them remained, Kaede sat back down and poured herself another cup of tea. "I've known Kagome for a long time. She was a mess when she first got here. The only straight man she let into her life at all was Miroku. He was her big brother, her counselor, and her only oasis. Since then, you are the only other man she's ever been close to aside from her birth brother. It took a great deal of courage on her part to get to know you." She saw Inuyasha had lowered his head and wasn't meeting either of their gazes. Ah, shame and humility. She'd give him quite a dose. "So have a little of your own. Running away from your responsibilities is easy. Everyone does it once. Those who have the courage to build their new lives and fulfill their dreams are the ones who succeed forever."

Inuyasha bit his lip, then stood. He set the cup down and headed towards the door. "Excuse me." He said, and left Sango and Kaede by themselves.

"Will he be okay or will she scalp him?"

"Time will tell, my dear."

Inuyasha walked into her apartment and heard the shower running. Quietly, he moved to the bathroom and opened the door. She was good at crying silently. It was part of her pride. She probably had a lot of experience at it. He took a deep breath and took the proverbial plunge. "I'll do it." He said quietly.

Kagome looked at the curtain, seeing his shadow cast by the light. His head was lowered, his hair hanging around him. She took several deep, soothing breaths to control herself. "You want to?"

He laughed. "Not really. But if I'm going to live here, I have to pull my weight, right?" He saw a tiny hand reach out and wrapped his own around it. It was minimal contact, but it felt good. He took a deep breath and after a moment, released her. "Tonight isn't good, but I'll go in with you next work day, alright?"

He heard her hum her agreement and wanted to touch her again. "I'll make you up something quick for dinner, alright?" He hesitated when she hummed her next response and finally left, feeling like he was walking on eggshells. Damn he felt like an ungrateful bastard. He closed the bathroom door and went into the kitchen, where he found a young man with a few pyrex dishes, fiddling with her oven, and bopping to something that was blaring from his headphones as he worked.

The boy turned and found Inuyasha staring at him and stared for a full minute before carefully setting down the dish so he wouldn't drop it. "Who the hell are you?" There was a pause and pieces went together in his head. "WAITADAMNMINUTE! You're that dead guy!!"

The water in the bathroom cut off and there was a scramble and within minutes, a dishevelled Kagome was in the kitchen as well, staring across the kitchen at none other than her dear, darling little brother. She tightened her bathrobe and looked from one to the other and saw they were about to come to blows. "Inuyasha, this is Souta, my little brother. Souta, I've told you about Inuyasha. He's not dead."

"Obviously..."

"He's sort of in..." She zeroed in on the food and moved. "Hiding...is that mama's cooking?"

"She's requesting a peace treaty. At least come wish Grandpa happy birthday, tell Hojo he's a pathetic looser, and call it a day." Souta opened the dishes and set about heating the warm ones. "Miso soup, grilled mackerel, rice, pickles, and mom's secret onigiri." He looked back at the hanyou. "Why you hiding?"

"Someone's trying to kill me."

Souta blinked, then grinned. "Cool."

"Not really." Kagome retorted, picking at a few things, then cursing when she saw that she was nearly late. "I've gotta go..." She took a few bites from each dish, ignoring the amused expression on her companions face, then sprinted from the room.

Five minutes later, Kagome stumbled in, wearing her black work pants and crisp white shirt as she pinned her hair up. She stuck the last few pins in, checked her watch, pecked her brother on the cheek, and Inuyasha on the lips before disappearing out the front door.

Inuyasha and Souta stood there stunned, until finally the younger brother recovered. "So...you play Halo?"

Inuyasha coughed to cover the fact that he was, quite frankly, stunned. "Who doesn't?" As the boy set up the game system, the hanyou finally processed what had happened and grinning slightly, decided that was definitely something he was going to look forward to from now on.

0o0o0o0o0o0o0

Today was hell.

Kagome had decided that an hour into her shift and that hadn't changed when her shift ended, five hours later. She groaned, rubbing her neck as she slammed her locker closed and shouldered her bag, heading towards the door. She reached it and found her brother and new housemate leaning against a light pole, backs to each other, as though they were watching out for people who might be coming after Inuyasha. She glanced around, walking towards them.

Inuyasha looked up and his expression brightened, as though he might have been looking forward to being able to walk her home. Which was crazy, of course.

She refused to set herself up to get hurt. She gave them a small smile, feeling tired, so tired. "I can walk home on my own, you know..."

The hanyou frowned, noticing that dim, haunted look in her eyes. He glanced towards Souta, who looked concerned as well. The boy moved to one side of his sister while Inuyasha stood on her other side. Inuyasha tried several times to start their usual question and answer session, but she wasn't having it and he found himself grossly disappointed. That short peck on the lips had put him in a great mood all day, but she obviously didn't feel the same way.

He finally resigned himself to silence until Kagome finally spoke.

"I thought you'd go home, Souta." She said quietly.

The boy grinned. "You're kidding right? Hojou still comes over to dinner. Tonight was one of those nights. I told her I'd ask you if it was okay, but I packed a bag before she ever gave me the food. Hell, if you'll let me, I'd move in, but I think your new boyfriend might have a problem with that-"

"He's not my boyfriend..." Kagome said quietly.

Inuyasha ground his teeth toghether, deciding he and Kagome were going to have a long talk when they got back to her place. Unfortunately for him, as soon as they walked in, he was attacked by Sango for going out without telling her, and by the time he got up to the apartment, she had all but collapsed into her bed. Souta was up, playing Halo again. Inuyasha ran a hand through his hair and sighed heavily as he sat down on the couch.

The couch he'd fallen asleep on the night before, cuddled up to the woman that had just denied having a relationship with him. His demon blood was racing, he felt angry, hurt, betrayed. Why the hell had she said that? She didn't have to say it so readily.

Was she still angry about earlier, or was it because of his money again?

Souta eyed him from the corner of his eye, noting that the hanyou had been extremely subdued since Kagome's comment about them not dating. "Are you in love with my sister?"

The hanyou's head whipped around, stunned that the boy had bluntly asked something like that. The boy was looking at the screen, navigating through the world, blowing up aliens, but wasn't focused on it. Inuyasha sighed, running a hand through his hair. "I don't know." He finally said. "I think she's interesting, attractive, and not a vapid twit like a lot of women I meet at social functions." He leaned back against the couch. "I...I trust her a lot more than people in my own social circle. She's the first person who didn't treat me like I was a god, despite my money, power..."

"Yeah, she's like that with everyone. I'm assuming everyone else has already given you the 'if you hurt her' song and dance." Souta paused the game and put down the controller. "I'm gonna tell you something that Kagome would skin me for."

Inuyasha looked at the boy, seeing a serious look on his face. "Maybe you shouldn't then..."

Souta shook his head and waved it away. "Hojou, that guy I was talking about? He's her ex-boyfriend. They had a pretty nasty break-up not long after she left Tokyo U. He isn't just her ex, everyone thought he was 'the one', including Kagome. I never liked him for her, but there's not much I could do until after the break up." He glanced towards the hall, making sure Kagome wasn't there.

Inuyasha frowned deeply. "So, if everyone thought he was so perfect, why did they break up?"

"At first, he acted the part of prince charming, bringing her gifts, showering attention on her. After they had sex once, he started acting like it was his due, and gradually became more and more rough with her. While she was in school, I came to her room one time and she had a black eye. She tried to shrug it off, but that's when things started going down hill. She was working in a legal office as an intern, and I think she saw a few too many people like her come through the doors, until she finally decided that she couldn't defend people like him anymore. She packed up and left school that week, came home, told her parents she was leaving, and left without even saying good bye to Hojou."

Inuyasha was stunned. "So...you're saying Kagome is...reluctant to try again, after going through that once?"

"I don't know the whole story. Mom, Hojou, and Kagome all tell very different accounts, but my money's on Kagome's. She hasn't even told me all of it." Souta gave him a serious look. "So, what I'm saying is, if you don't or can't really love her, don't get her hopes up. She's been hurt enough..." With that, the boy turned back to his game.

Inuyasha sat there, contemplating that story for awhile, then got off the couch, moving to the kitchen, where he began mechanically putting away the food that was left out. He kept turning the information he'd just learned over in his head again and again. He'd had no idea. He'd been told repeatedly that Kagome wasn't usually as close with men as she was with him. He had never thought to ask why she might feel that way, why she held men at arms length.

He moved towards the girl's bedroom and found her sprawled on her bed, face buried into the comforter, still dressed in her work clothes, fast asleep, if he was gauging properly, from her slow, even breathing, and motionless form. His face softened from it's normal scowl and he moved towards her, pulling the blanket from the foot of her bed and pulling it over her gently.

The girl stirred and opened one bleary eye up at him. "'Nuyasha...?" That one eye turned wary.

He just brushed her hair back and tucked the blanket around her. "Sleep well." He said quietly. As he pulled back, he found her hand wrapped tightly around his. He looked down at her and saw her eyes closed. "Kagome?"

She squeezed his hand tighter and felt herself drifting to sleep again. She should get out of her work clothes and get in her pajama's, but she was so tired. She felt the hand slip out of hers and heard her hanyou friend digging around her room. She'd chastize him later. It was rude to invade someone's privacy...

He returned to her side and gently shifted her into his arms. He'd found an oversized t-shirt and pulled it over her work clothes. Making sure he couldn't peep, he began unfastening the buttons on her shirt, removing it under the t-shirt, leaving her top half covered the entire time. Then, he removed her pants, trying not to notice the pale blue butterfly lace boy-short cut underwear that peaked beneath the shirt. He flipped her blankets down and tucked her beneath them. As he pulled back, he found sleepy eyes looking up at him in confusion.

"What 're you doin'?"

Her sleep slurred speech brought a smile to his face, even though it was a sad one. He tucked a hair behind her ear and stood. "I'll get a bowl of water so you can wash your face..."

"'Nuyasha...?"

He walked away, biting his lip hard. He was doing the only thing he could. He didn't understand why, but he needed to take care of her. He had felt this urge for awhile but had only been able to do it a few times. The urge was nearly too strong to resist, and he wanted to prove to her that he could take care of her. That if she let him, he would.

When he returned, with a washrag and bowl in hand, she'd dozed off again. He wet the cloth and began gently wiping her face clean of make-up.

Souta watched the hanyou tend to his sister from the door way. He grinned a bit, nodding. He'd heard lots from his sister about the hanyou, and the main reason he'd come was to see what the hanyou thought of her as well. He watched for a few more moments before finally walking away.

He approved.

0o0o0o0o0o0o0

_AN: So, did it take me long enough? Don't answer that. Sorry about the wait, my life's been really crazy, and I decided to rewrite what I had so far at 6 pages, which is what's here now. Anyways, tell me what you think _


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